CTB on monday

[justcallmeJ]

So I made monday april 15th the date im gonna ctb using sn. Its after the weekend where I have one final goodbye activity with my bf, and before i have some meeting with a social worker about how to continue with my future. On mondays my mom usually is gone for most of the day, so i can do it without being rescued, but wont rot away for days.

I tried to recover so many times but unfortunatly everything got worse. Im even hated by all of my family now, I only have my estranged dad left, which i was gaslighted to hate for years ;(

I keep thinking about whats gonna happen after death, i kinda hope there is an afterlife, it sounds nice.. ctb is constantly in my mind aswell, i have played so many different scenarios in my head its crazy >.< I just want peace for once :(

I will make a goodbye thread when the time comes where will document the process.

 

[rozeske]

I wish you all the best and incase I miss your GT, I hope you find your peace and I hope that peace is whatever you wish it to be.
Is there a way you can do it away from your home, someplace you won't be interrupted or a place your mom won't be the first to find you?

 

[justcallmeJ]

I wish you all the best and incase I miss your GT, I hope you find your peace and I hope that peace is whatever you wish it to be.
Is there a way you can do it away from your home, someplace you won't be interrupted or a place your mom won't be the first to find you?

Thanks <3
I want my mom to find me because she has been tormenting me a lot more lately, and she is the reason I am like this.

 

[rozeske]

Thanks <3
I want my mom to find me because she has been tormenting me a lot more lately, and she is the reason I am like this.

I don't think it would benefit any of you but I guess it's your choice. Make sure your vengeance plan doesn't cost you, incase she or anyone else shows up unexpectedly.

 

[arthurkuzechov]

So I made monday april 15th the date im gonna ctb using sn. Its after the weekend where I have one final goodbye activity with my bf, and before i have some meeting with a social worker about how to continue with my future. On mondays my mom usually is gone for most of the day, so i can do it without being rescued, but wont rot away for days.

I tried to recover so many times but unfortunatly everything got worse. Im even hated by all of my family now, I only have my estranged dad left, which i was gaslighted to hate for years ;(

I keep thinking about whats gonna happen after death, i kinda hope there is an afterlife, it sounds nice.. ctb is constantly in my mind aswell, i have played so many different scenarios in my head its crazy >.< I just want peace for once :(

I will make a goodbye thread when the time comes where will document the process.

Oh, I wish you good luck with your plans and wish you to find a better place without any pin on other side after ctb. Much love

 

[FuneralCry]

I wish you the best of luck in your plans, I hope that you find the freedom you search for.

 

[_AllCatsAreGrey_]

Wish you the best. I'm happy that our paths crossed. Sorry this world (and particularly your mom) has been so cruel. I feel fortunate that I returned to SaSu in time to see you again. I hope that you're able to find peace.

Even if the afterlife isn't true, perhaps thinking about a happy place will help you. You deserve to be happy, if only in imagination.

 

[Light_]

So I made monday april 15th the date im gonna ctb using sn. Its after the weekend where I have one final goodbye activity with my bf, and before i have some meeting with a social worker about how to continue with my future. On mondays my mom usually is gone for most of the day, so i can do it without being rescued, but wont rot away for days.

I tried to recover so many times but unfortunatly everything got worse. Im even hated by all of my family now, I only have my estranged dad left, which i was gaslighted to hate for years ;(

I keep thinking about whats gonna happen after death, i kinda hope there is an afterlife, it sounds nice.. ctb is constantly in my mind aswell, i have played so many different scenarios in my head its crazy >.< I just want peace for once :(

I will make a goodbye thread when the time comes where will document the process.

My friend in a way, I hope there is an afterlife too. Although I'm not waiting until Monday, it is my time now. I want to be here such as I can for a little bit to connect with other people who are departing around the same time. Provides me some sort of comfort maybe, in a situation where there is really none to be had.

 

[AllMyDreams]

So I made monday april 15th the date im gonna ctb using sn. Its after the weekend where I have one final goodbye activity with my bf, and before i have some meeting with a social worker about how to continue with my future. On mondays my mom usually is gone for most of the day, so i can do it without being rescued, but wont rot away for days.

I tried to recover so many times but unfortunatly everything got worse. Im even hated by all of my family now, I only have my estranged dad left, which i was gaslighted to hate for years ;(

I keep thinking about whats gonna happen after death, i kinda hope there is an afterlife, it sounds nice.. ctb is constantly in my mind aswell, i have played so many different scenarios in my head its crazy >.< I just want peace for once :(

I will make a goodbye thread when the time comes where will document the process.

I'm sorry you got to this point. I hope that you know, in case you have second thoughts at any point during the process, that it won't be too late to call an ambulance. So just in case, I would have that number ready to go. No one will think less of you if you change your mind.

If you go through with it I wish you well wherever you next end up.

 

[justcallmeJ]

I don't think it would benefit any of you but I guess it's your choice. Make sure your vengeance plan doesn't cost you, incase she or anyone else shows up unexpectedly.

Its a chance i have to take, a person this horrible deserves this. I live alone so shes the only one who can cause it to fail

Oh, I wish you good luck with your plans and wish you to find a better place without any pin on other side after ctb. Much love

Thanks, much love back <3

I wish you the best of luck in your plans, I hope that you find the freedom you search for.

Thanks <3 i really hope it is

Wish you the best. I'm happy that our paths crossed. Sorry this world (and particularly your mom) has been so cruel. I feel fortunate that I returned to SaSu in time to see you again. I hope that you're able to find peace.

Even if the afterlife isn't true, perhaps thinking about a happy place will help you. You deserve to be happy, if only in imagination.

Im happy it did also <3

My friend in a way, I hope there is an afterlife too. Although I'm not waiting until Monday, it is my time now. I want to be here such as I can for a little bit to connect with other people who are departing around the same time. Provides me some sort of comfort maybe, in a situation where there is really none to be had.

May we meet in the afterlife then :3
Good luck on your journey <3

I'm sorry you got to this point. I hope that you know, in case you have second thoughts at any point during the process, that it won't be too late to call an ambulance. So just in case, I would have that number ready to go. No one will think less of you if you change your mind.

If you go through with it I wish you well wherever you next end up.

Thanks you <3 i have been thinking about that too, and if the amount of regrets gets too great i will call

 

[IonicLemon69]

Good luck with your plans. I wish you the best in whatever you choose to do. Will be watching for updates from you come Monday. Always enjoy reading your comments on here & love your profile picture!

 

[justcallmeJ]

Good luck with your plans. I wish you the best in whatever you choose to do. Will be watching for updates from you come Monday. Always enjoy reading your comments on here & love your profile picture!

Thanks <3 i love yours too, Kuromi is the best sanrio character :3

 

[YosemiteGrrl]

So I made monday april 15th the date im gonna ctb using sn. Its after the weekend where I have one final goodbye activity with my bf, and before i have some meeting with a social worker about how to continue with my future. On mondays my mom usually is gone for most of the day, so i can do it without being rescued, but wont rot away for days.

I tried to recover so many times but unfortunatly everything got worse. Im even hated by all of my family now, I only have my estranged dad left, which i was gaslighted to hate for years ;(

I keep thinking about whats gonna happen after death, i kinda hope there is an afterlife, it sounds nice.. ctb is constantly in my mind aswell, i have played so many different scenarios in my head its crazy >.< I just want peace for once :(

I will make a goodbye thread when the time comes where will document the process.

Wishing deep peace for you. Thank you so much for documenting your process for us.

 

[justcallmeJ]

Wishing deep peace for you. Thank you so much for documenting your process for us.

Thanks, and np <3



I might have ruined the chance im gonna be alone on monday, my mom decided to make my life hell again before i leave for work and i indirectly told her im gonna ctb soon. If that is the case im gonna go to a secluded spot not far from my home, that will mean i can watch the sunset. I just hope the weather is a bit nice