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moonlight2.0

moonlight2.0

Member
Mar 1, 2025
21
Not sure how to put this, I have always wanted to find a way out of this world I have been in pain for to many years and always wanted to ctb, I have sh'ed for years and now it's time I get my plan into action my main worry is survival instinct and if I decide to go I'll stuff up again so I'm not sure.
 
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locked*n*loaded

locked*n*loaded

Archangel
Apr 15, 2022
8,958
SI is a natural and normal thing. CTB is hard. No one ever said it was easy. It shouldn't be easy, really. It's a last resort kind of thing.
 
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moonlight2.0

moonlight2.0

Member
Mar 1, 2025
21
SI is a natural and normal thing. CTB is hard. No one ever said it was easy. It shouldn't be easy, really. It's a last resort kind of thing.
Thank you for your input
 
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Mooncry

Mooncry

꥟♡⏾
Sep 11, 2024
259
I'm scared of SI too… Terrified even. I know that dying is what I truly want, but SI will make me think that it's not. But I know that if I back out, I'll just go right back to wanting to die again. I wish I had some magical advice for avoiding it, but I don't think that's possible. I've heard taking benzos can at least make it more tolerable.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,590
I've always wanted to be gone as well, I understand finding it painful to suffer in this existence, existing is always very painful to me. But anyway I wish you the best.
 
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seaquake

seaquake

lethargic
Jan 30, 2025
34
remember that there is a big difference between SI and not really wanting to die
 
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JesiBel

JesiBel

protoTYPE:4rp14
Dec 5, 2024
737
remember that there is a big difference between SI and not really wanting to die
Yes, it really is complicated.

When you run out of energy and all options. Sometimes life never offers you anything good, a hopeless future, years go by and things don't change or they get worse. I think we all would have liked to have a peaceful and happy life. CTB is our last option to deal with so much suffering.

SI is something natural in our organism/system, to keep us safe and alive. A response to danger that invites reaction.

Dealing with both is the hardest part.
 
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LifeIsASadist

LifeIsASadist

Its only a matter of time
Oct 16, 2024
237
If you can somehow get ahold of xanax it would help fight off the survival instinct.
 
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