Discussion complicated mdma experience

[coolgal82]

just wanted to share this as a sequel to my previous post lmao
mdma is awesome
however like i did not expect to send fucking 63 dms to my besties saying how much i love them and even sending them a fucking song like "this song makes me think of you" like what the fuck
i dmed alot of people but most only got 1 dm and even the second highest amount was my dad who got 3
but fucking 63 messages sharing stuff that like i really would rather have not shared lmao. when the effects started wearing off it hit me what i did and i almost had like a panic attack or something and cut myself the deepest i have ever, like very deep styro maybe even baby beans i didnt get a clear look. but jfc the fear i felt in that moment cus i was convinced they were gonna think im weird and leave me. i've only felt that a few times (the most similar being probably when i cut for the first time) but like that was really not how i was expecting the night to go lmao

overall though the experience was very nice although my jaw fucking aches and i definitely didnt drink enough cus i had a headache right after it wore off that went away when i started drinking water lmao

also my besties were luckily atleast like outwardly fine and i managed to keep my mouth shut on some of the worst bits atleast lmao but jfc. i may be a tad bit mentally ill lmao. its also an awkward spot cus i could just say "sorry its the drugs" but i also didnt want them to think i didnt actually care about them that much lmao

but yeah will definitely be doing this again in like 1-3 months. not my fav drug i've tried so far (thats probably either pregabalin or dxm) but its very good.

edit: forgor to add this is the song and like if you look at the lyrics you will see how bad it is lmao

 

[mental disorder]

I have tried mdm four times and, for some reason, I didn't get any pleasure at all:(. No, there is physical pleasure, but for some reason the more physical pleasure I get, the more moral discomfort I feel. I don't know what this has to do with. The last time I took mdma was as bad as it can get. I felt worse than usual for a week afterward

 

[coolgal82]

I have tried mdm four times and, for some reason, I didn't get any pleasure at all:(. No, there is physical pleasure, but for some reason the more physical pleasure I get, the more moral discomfort I feel. I don't know what this has to do with. The last time I took mdma was as bad as it can get. I felt worse than usual for a week afterward

weird, were you maybe on like meds that interfered with it or something? or like was it fake or something?

 

[mental disorder]

weird, were you maybe on like meds that interfered with it or something? or like was it fake or something?

I don't know. The mdma was great quality and I didn't take any pills :(. The first time was fine, but then I started to feel some kind of synthetic pleasure, I don't know how to describe it. It's so good that it makes you feel bad, I guess it's similar. I liked the LSD experience better!
upd. I guess under mdma I was just under the pressure of saying something unnecessary/writing to someone I didn't want to write to o-O