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C

CuriousAboutThis

Uncertainty in life uncertainty for the next life
Dec 30, 2018
533
Ashley dream girl,
Future wife,
Future kids,
And us getting old,
I would love for that dream to come true,
I can't suffer with you or without you,
But I realized that you didn't want me,
To leave you,
But instead you wanted to help me,
You just wanted me to get my act together,
Ashley we can't play anymore games,
Because you know it destroyed me,
Please don't use the footage,
Just to blackmail me like you did last time,
No more psych wards,
No more isolation chambers,
No more jail or lockup or prison,
I just want and need you,
I will cry and cry for you until the end of the world,
Or cry for myself,
And try to get my act together,
And I don't want anyone to take advantage of you,
I don't want anyone to try to get you high off crack, fruit, salt, and fentanyl,
Because you know that would hurt me,
Deep inside,
I really do love you Ashley,
I just want to get my act together,
I gave up my last inhibitions which was the vape,
I understood how it was killing our family and you,
I forgive you all for what you did to me,
And yes I did deserve it but we all played a role,
We all have our sins and virtues,
Cast the stone,
Either way Ashley,
I live for you and love you we both suffered enough please help me, save me, and find me,
Just come back to me not because I miss you because I want to be loved by you,
As I realized that I love you I just need to get my act together,
I still stand by this until the day I die until the day I'm dead,
I will stand by you,
I will be your shadow,
As you stand in the light,
The forest, the fort, and the dream catcher,
My guilt and shame I still have,
As I forgive you all for what you did to me,
As I went insane because of it,
And how you went insane because of me,
And we deserved it since we all played a role in it,
But Ashley my girl,
My dream,
My memory,
My nightmare,
And my reality,
I know I told you deserve to be happy and I deserve to be miserable,
But in reality Ashley,
I want to be happy with you,
And I don't want you to be miserable because of me,
I just want to see your great smile one more time I don't want you to pretend the next time I see you to say, "Do we know each other"
Because Ashley I love you I still remember the past, present, and potential future if I get my act together because I want to be engaged,
Married, have kids, and get old together,
Because my love for you is truly that strong within me.
 
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Dead_Inside

Dead_Inside

Wizard
Jul 2, 2018
622
That is beautiful...... "I live for you and I love you we both suffered enough please help me, save me, find me ..." that is my prayer so many nights.... he can't hear it though.
 
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Memento Mori

Memento Mori

shambling garbage
Jan 24, 2019
573
 
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cccitrus

cccitrus

i just want death and
Aug 14, 2018
40
i can feel you wrote down your deepest feelings and that's incredible and artistic...
 
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