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iloverachel

Enlightened
Mar 7, 2024
1,217
Feeling like complete and utter shit is just the norm for me. I honestly don't remember the last time I felt good. Maybe 10 years ago? I have no idea what it even feels like anymore

I have had some okay days but they are quite rare this past decade

For every 50 bad terrible days I may have one day where I feel okay

How about you guys? How many good or okay days do you have compares to bad days where you feel crap?
 
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teajay1

teajay1

crazy cat lady
Mar 27, 2024
90
yes i can't remember the last day where i felt 'ok'. i just have some worse days than others and they stick out a lot
 
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I

iloverachel

Enlightened
Mar 7, 2024
1,217
yes i can't remember the last day where i felt 'ok'. i just have some worse days than others and they stick out a lot
Even for me the rare okay days are still quite boring and pointless

Most days are absolute terrible. Some days are bad, slightly terrible etc. Okay is just relative to the worse days.

Even if I had only okay days I'd still want to ctb
 
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billie

billie

take me back to the night we met
Mar 31, 2024
623
I feel like shit every day
 
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flightless bird

flightless bird

somewhere over the rainbow
Aug 18, 2022
299
very painful knowing that you will never experience something that lets you breathe for real again. i remember all my dreams and how they used to make me feel. i can still visualize them, see into all those old emotions, but i can't ever experience them. they are just so far away from the heart.
 
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divinemistress36

divinemistress36

Angelic
Jan 1, 2024
4,805
Same I would kill just to feel neutral
 
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I

iloverachel

Enlightened
Mar 7, 2024
1,217
very painful knowing that you will never experience something that lets you breathe for real again. i remember all my dreams and how they used to make me feel. i can still visualize them, see into all those old emotions, but i can't ever experience them. they are just so far away from the heart.
I gave up on my dreams hobbies and passion

My biggest passion when I was young was lifting weights but now it seems like a daunting chore and I don't even feel better exercising
Same I would kill just to feel neutral
Even neutral days for me turn bad quickly because I know it won't last long and I'll have a shit day the next day mist likely
Same I would kill just to feel neutral
Even neutral days for me turn bad quickly because I know it won't last long and I'll have a shit day the next day mist likely
Same I would kill just to feel neutral
Even neutral days for me turn bad quickly because I know it won't last long and I'll have a shit day the next day mist likely
 
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DogSandwich

DogSandwich

You know, like a failure
Apr 4, 2024
29
I can't remember what it feels like to experience happiness. I'm done with all of this and I don't expect anything anymore. I just go through the motions.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
45,149
To me it wouldn't even make sense to feel good about existing. I find it tragic how I was forced into this hellish and harmful reality where there is no limit as to how much I can potentially suffer. I've never wanted to exist and never could do under any circumstance, being conscious and aware is so incredibly dreadful and only causes suffering.

There's nothing good about having the ability to suffer endlessly in this undesirable existence that there was never a need for in the first place especially as existing can get so torturous beyond how one could even imagine. More than anything I wish I never existed at all, existence itself is evil and an abomination as it's the source of all suffering, all that would be good to me is finally being able to permanently cease existing.
 
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Malaria

Malaria

If I can't be my own, I'd feel better dead
Feb 24, 2024
1,084
Yeah, I haven't been truly happy or okay since I was 8 years old. I'm 29 now.
 
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divinemistress36

divinemistress36

Angelic
Jan 1, 2024
4,805
I gave up on my dreams hobbies and passion

My biggest passion when I was young was lifting weights but now it seems like a daunting chore and I don't even feel better exercising

Even neutral days for me turn bad quickly because I know it won't last long and I'll have a shit day the next day mist likely

Even neutral days for me turn bad quickly because I know it won't last long and I'll have a shit day the next day mist likely

Even neutral days for me turn bad quickly because I know it won't last long and I'll have a shit day the next day mist likely
I feel the same . People talk about how exercise makes you feel better but sometimes it can just make you feel worse
 
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Suicidebydeath

Suicidebydeath

No chances to be happy - dead inside
Nov 25, 2021
3,558
Yes but I also have PSSD. I also don't think I've ever felt good? I can have periods where I feel ok.
 
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to fall to winter

to fall to winter

tired
Sep 10, 2023
19
I don't think I've ever felt good, and the okay days are few and far between.
 
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R

random_user

Human existence is a scam.
Jun 17, 2022
84
I know what you mean, in my case I've felt like this my whole adult life and can't really remember anymore when things felt different.
 
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S

sadman710

Student
Mar 22, 2024
191
Yeah, definitely. I'm at a point where I'm certain that every moment that progresses in the future is going to be a greater hell to endure. I have nothing to look forward to except greater and greater suffering. So I'm just trying to make the best of now while I can, if that makes any sense.
 
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DogSandwich

DogSandwich

You know, like a failure
Apr 4, 2024
29
Same. I'm just seeing and waiting. Everything carries the same intense weight. I'm done, but but don't know how to quit.
 
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F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
13,093
I sympathise. I remember talking to the college therapist over 10 years ago and she tried to get me to recall a time when I was happy and I couldn't really. I can probably remember happy moments but not much consistence. It's hard to know what even is normal though when it feels like it's always been like this.
 
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Mea Culpa

Mea Culpa

Mea Culpa, Mea Maxima Culpa, Kyrie Eleison
Sep 22, 2023
173
I think so. It all feels so fake. Like a placebo. It never feels ok to be okay...
 
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onbekend

onbekend

Experienced
Jan 14, 2024
265
I can tell you that I used to feel good or at least okay 2 years ago. But I too can relate, because I also have completely forgotten what it's like to feel even a little "okay" now.
 
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ijustwishtodie

ijustwishtodie

I have finally found my ultimate bliss
Oct 29, 2023
5,796
I never knew what it's like to feel good to begin with. I'll die without ever finding out the answer to this either
 
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TiredTurtle

TiredTurtle

Member
Oct 29, 2023
99
i remember what it feels like to feel good and know it will never happen again and i dont know which is worse, to have felt good and know theres no recovery or to have never felt good in your life and not know what your missing
 
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HopingOnaMiracle

HopingOnaMiracle

Specialist
Mar 8, 2024
334
I can feel alright when im with friends, especially when drinking alcohol. But most of the time i feel like shit.
 
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N

NeverGonnaEscape

Member
Mar 23, 2024
30
I haven't felt good happy or excited about anything in almost 20 years I think, about half my life.
 
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C

Cute_&_Loving

I like trinkets:)
May 10, 2023
423
Same for me. Can't believe bc of my mother's stupid decision I have to suffer….
 
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H

hopeless08

Arcanist
Dec 8, 2023
492
Feeling like complete and utter shit is just the norm for me. I honestly don't remember the last time I felt good. Maybe 10 years ago? I have no idea what it even feels like anymore

I have had some okay days but they are quite rare this past decade

For every 50 bad terrible days I may have one day where I feel okay

How about you guys? How many good or okay days do you have compares to bad days where you feel crap?
I'm so sorry that's terrible, I can't imagine what suffering for 10 years must be like.
You're beyond strong, I can't take another hour. Sorry for your pain
 
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