Kinda feel bad posting cuz it's hard to me to respond and reciprocate right now. Please don't worry about responding if you don't want ^^
I ended up cutting the last 'bridge' I had with someone last night, and almost certainly shared way too much, and got a subsequent wellness check (U.S.).
Hate myself for doing cutting that bridge, but I refuse to take anyone with me as I figuratively sink.
Mislead without lying (lots of omission and redirection again) and got the cops to leave, but I probably wasn't probably wasn't particularly convincing.
I was genuinely so close to being upfront with them after it was over, while they were discussing outside, agreeing/asking to go to the hospital.
Ended up not doing that because that would probably be the worst thing for me right now, plus I can't afford it, especially if I get committed.
I know I need help, I want help. While my desire to CTB keeps flipflopping, my resolve and acknowledgement that I must CTB hasn't faltered.
(My existence and every actuion hurts those I care about, and that almost certainly will never change, no matter how much help I get or work I put in.)
There's nothing left to live for, all my preparations are all but complete, and I don't even know who I can reach out to at this point, especially now that my CTB date is less than a week away.
Idk :3
(Humorously and non-seriously) Anywho, how's the weather?
But genuinely, what would it take for you, dear reader, to not CTB?
If there were a 'Big Friendly Button' that could fix everything, what would that button do?
Do you dream of finding a non-CTB escape route?
I ended up cutting the last 'bridge' I had with someone last night, and almost certainly shared way too much, and got a subsequent wellness check (U.S.).
Hate myself for doing cutting that bridge, but I refuse to take anyone with me as I figuratively sink.
Mislead without lying (lots of omission and redirection again) and got the cops to leave, but I probably wasn't probably wasn't particularly convincing.
I was genuinely so close to being upfront with them after it was over, while they were discussing outside, agreeing/asking to go to the hospital.
Ended up not doing that because that would probably be the worst thing for me right now, plus I can't afford it, especially if I get committed.
I know I need help, I want help. While my desire to CTB keeps flipflopping, my resolve and acknowledgement that I must CTB hasn't faltered.
(My existence and every actuion hurts those I care about, and that almost certainly will never change, no matter how much help I get or work I put in.)
There's nothing left to live for, all my preparations are all but complete, and I don't even know who I can reach out to at this point, especially now that my CTB date is less than a week away.
Idk :3
(Humorously and non-seriously) Anywho, how's the weather?
But genuinely, what would it take for you, dear reader, to not CTB?
If there were a 'Big Friendly Button' that could fix everything, what would that button do?
Do you dream of finding a non-CTB escape route?
