NSFW A rare disorder has robbed me of sexual function

[omensetter]

A month and a half ago I experienced sudden numbness that affected my penis. It is now a dead, rubbery thing that responds to nothing. No libido, no sexual sensation. Before this happened I had a very active sex life with several partners. I do not wish to live the rest of my life, or even another year, as an involuntary asexual. I have taken two months off of work for probably useless doctor visits. If I have no changes to my condition by the end of the month I plan to die by SN. Every day I have had this has been absolute mental torture. Even casual mentions of sex trigger intense feelings of grief for what I can no longer have. The world has gone grey and i am not the same person anymore.

 

[metfan647]

I'm really sorry to read this. This must be a very very difficult time. May I ask if you've been referred for any further support?

 

[omensetter]

I am lucky to have a very supportive family. They left me a heartbreaking note in the hospital during my second stay in September — you are surrounded by love, you'd be cured if love could heal you. I really wish that was the case. Psychiatrists and most doctors don't have a clue how to handle a case like mine, because I am not depressed, or at least I wasn't. I just have a condition that I want euthanasia for.

Every night my dreams torment me with sexual scenarios and nightmares born of my own ruminations.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Welcome to SaSu!

I'm sorry you have to go through this.

 

[darksouls]

you are welcome
I am very sorry for your situation

 

[whywere]

It is so nice having you here as a new family member and a good friend, WELCOME!!!!

My heart and soul go out to you with your condition; however I am wishing you the very best with the doctors that they can find a way to help you.

Again, WELCOME!

Walter