Kayla
quetiapine <3
- Dec 23, 2024
- 171
It feels like I can't do anything right. Everyone in my life is leaving me because of how much I fuck up. I don't even know what I'm doing so wrong. A woman I had seen for 10 years sent me a message a couple of months ago saying she couldn't see me anymore and then blocked me. 10 years and she couldn't even say it to me. This woman went through so much stuff with me, like when I got taken into foster care. When I had to rewatch the interview that I had to do when I was 10, and had disclosed sexual abuse. She was there when I got moved around the county to different foster placements. She was the one who ultimately saved my life on the 16th of May; if she hadn't phoned the police, I wouldn't be here. She saw me fighting for my life in the hospital, and she even wrote in the hospital diary," Remember that the world is a better place with you in it." Well, clearly not, if only a few months later, she just blocked me out of the blue. I don't understand why I'm such a bad person. Everyone in my life is leaving. Someone I met on here and thought I was friends with unfriended me. I care about people too much, even if they couldn't give 1 shit about me. I feel so alone, and I can't stop crying. I just know I can't fail my attempt. I can't do it anymore. I feel like I just ruin everyone's lives when I'm in it. I think everyone will just be much happier when I'm not here, and i know that i'll quickly be forgotten because i've done nothing memorable in my life. I'm just a massive fuck up. I couldn't even do the sn right and now my life is even worse. Hopefully I'll get the sn attempt right this time. Too everyone i've ever talked to on this site i'm sorry you even had to acknowledge my existence.
