What’s your closest encounter?

[Siamese Believe]

Do you have any times where you were genuinely about to cross over but then backed out at the last second?

I had a moment like this, when I was 19. I was extremely close to the edge of a cliff, like right there at the very tip. One wrong step or losing balance would've resulted in a fall. I backed out though and went home.

 

[BrainSplatter]

Hard to remember, is that just me but I have almost no recollection of some attempts whatsoever like I read it on my medical file and it all comes back. Anyone else?

When I was 14 I think it was like day 2-3 after moving into my care home and I ran out the door and kept running until I saw the motorway which was 10 mins away. My carer was slowly following behind when I got to it there was only cars driving past I knew it needed to be a lorry so it would kill instantly when I finally saw one coming I remember it beeping so loud again and again and I ran in front of it and then started to back away because of fear I was scared of the pain and my mind changed. I was still partially in the road so my carer ran and tackled me to the floor holding me down until my other carer came in their car and they both lifted my body into the air and restrained me in a back of the car and then shouting at me saying I could of killed them I remember how angry they were but I was ready to die. I think if they weren't there I would have tried once more and succeeded. I wouldn't choose such a method again because of how traumatic it would be for the other person. I was so ready it's like my SI came out of nowhere.

When I was 16 I remember attempting hanging but I backed out and hooked my foot on my shelving so then I pulled it closer towards me and stood up on it and climbed out.

Besides that, I've taken so many impulsive overdoses or drunk cleaning products then backed out of it because of how much pain I was in and how horrific it felt. It was before I found this site I'd take boxes of paracetamol and then back out and call a friend or 111 then get hospitalised for days - a week and then I'd get discharged and do the same exact thing again like I was so ready to die I remember gagging on the pills trying to swallow more and drinking pepsi with crushed pills inside.

 

[TheUncommon]

Few weeks ago was the closest. Partial suspension, backed out as my entire body went numb after my neck was constricted for a few full seconds. Didn't feel like I could control or feel my body but I loosened the knot in time. (I was in a semi-public space during busy hours)

 

[NoHorizon]

A few years back I went to Beachy Head to jump. Got to the edge and couldn't do it; the drop didn't look straight down and it was so high I just froze.

 

[heydude56]

Tried partial multiple times, succeeded to pass out every time but unfortunately for some reason regained consciousness afterwards

 

[DontTouchMeImFamous]

A few years back I went to Beachy Head to jump. Got to the edge and couldn't do it; the drop didn't look straight down and it was so high I just froze.

Do you regret not jumping?

 

[LevUwU]

Do you have any times where you were genuinely about to cross over but then backed out at the last second?

I had a moment like this, when I was 19. I was extremely close to the edge of a cliff, like right there at the very tip. One wrong step or losing balance would've resulted in a fall. I backed out though and went home.

I was 13, maybe 14. I had my parents gun in my hands, loaded, cocked. Safety on, however. I stared at it in my lap for a long time, before my cat came in and I decided not to. It was thanks to her that I was alive, and now she's gone just like any chance of happiness.

 

[Unlucky777]

When I was 12. I had a knife to my neck ready to cut open. I don't remember exactly why I backed off but I regret not finishing the act. All those years after were not worth the suffering. Now it's infinitely harder to do the act fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck

 

[LevUwU]

I was 13, maybe 14. I had my parents gun in my hands, loaded, cocked. Safety on, however. I stared at it in my lap for a long time, before my cat came in and I decided not to. It was thanks to her that I was alive, and now she's gone just like any chance of happiness.

A separate time, I was in a noose I had made when it slipped, freeing me. I decided then that it was good enough, and I'd go later. The rope I had used was later confiscated after my mental hospital visit led to my room being searched

 

[NoHorizon]

Do you regret not jumping?

I do, yeah.

 

[kouna]

I jumped from a construction site's 3rd floor but it was impulsive without any planning. Had a panic attack at work, ran across the street to the building, ran up the stairs and jumped over the balcony, no pause.
I regret it because it was a stupid impulsive decision. Had it been 10+ floors it would have been worth it.
I don't think I was close to dying though, just badly injured and spent a couple of months hospitalised and another 2 in bed.