Venting whats the point.

[SenelXamano]

I don't want to be here anymore. Im tired of feeling like shit. I can't stop fantasizing about him and what it'd be like to be with him. I can't go to sleep without thinking about it. I can't hang out with my other friends without thinking about it. I can't be alone without thinking about it. I can't talk to him without thinking about it. He's perfect in every way. He's smart, talented, he's funny, he's really really cute. I really wish he liked guys. He's everything to me. I don't see a reason to be here without him. I don't want to hurt him. I need a way out it's the only way. Ill only hurt him staying alive.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Have you heard of 'limerence'? An obsessive crush. It might be worth looking in to. I used to have limerent crushes on guys and, it was all consuming and awful too.

 

[SenelXamano]

Have you heard of 'limerence'? An obsessive crush. It might be worth looking in to. I used to have limerent crushes on guys and, it was all consuming and awful too.

limerence implies I don't love him. I wouldn't be this upset or obsessed if my best friend wasn't with him. I'm being evaluated for bpd after my mother convinced me to see a psychiatrist so that might be what's going on.