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daruino

odi et amo
Nov 9, 2025
90
I'm wondering if anyone here has any experience with medication (anti depressants?) and whether or not it has helped you.

My therapist recently referred me to a psychiatrist and hopefully sometime soon I will be able to have a consultation. I guess I suffer from depression/intense low moods/emptiness/suicidal thoughts continuously. I understand there is no magic med but sometimes I wonder if perhaps my mood were a bit better I would actually be able to do things and improve my life/overall wellbeing.

On the other side I'm also very scared because I don't want to worsen anything or become dependent.

I would really appreciate to hear anyone's experiences (positive or negative) or if someone has any helpful resources so I could do some own research before my appointment. Thanks!
 
I

idontknowwhatiam

Specialist
Sep 10, 2025
372
I tried SSRI's but didn't like the side effects.... I had some improvement with depression, anxiety and SI microdosing ketamine troches.
 
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C

copioushopelessness

Specialist
Aug 27, 2025
388
Meds ruined my life. My personality and creativity gone. My ability to think gone. Many side effects. Trying to get off them is torture. The doctors seem to be in denial of the withdrawal symptoms. At best they call it "discontinuation symptoms" but downplay it. Made me completely suicidal when before I was only suicidal sometimes.
 
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thermosgrenadine

thermosgrenadine

terror always ricochets
Feb 6, 2026
12
i'd be completely off the rails without medication. diagnosed bipolar ii, my mom is also. i also have some other issue that causes psychosis although we're not sure what it is yet. along with gender dysphoria, depression, anxiety, blah blah blah

a lot of it is just hopping between meds to figure out what's right for you. i've tried a lot of different ones and the ones i take right now are pretty good to me and i intend to stay on them. my goal one day is to be on as few meds as possible but i likely will have to stay on them my entire life due to my psychological conditions, etc. i've also been on meds that have made me even more suicidal and even made me self-harm, too. it's really just a gamble.

like you said there is no magic med. the pills are intended to improve your mood enough to be able to work on yourself more effectively both in and out of therapy. although from what you've said OP i think you understand that. in terms of helpful resources, i've heard you can do genetic testing that will help psychiatrists and doctors figure out what medications will be most effective generally. i don't know what the cost of any of that is though
 
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trying ungracefully

trying ungracefully

Student
Jun 11, 2025
176
Good. I need them and can't go off them if I want to be stable since I have bipolar 1 and psychosis/paranoia stuff. I don't like that it has to be forever but I just accept it because I don't want to go back to the hospital.

I take 6 different medications which I don't like either because it's a lot but it has helped me so much. When I was seeing my last psychiatrist out of inpatient I was a zombie who could barely think or interact with people. Now that I see this good psychiatrist I am feeling really like myself and I am able to feel emotions other than nothing or sadness.

I took medication for 9 years of my life (on and off before 2 years ago) and this is the first time I really feel good on them. I think it's something that could really help a lot of people if they are able to find a good psychiatrist. It just takes a lot of time sometimes.
 
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campo d'erba

campo d'erba

Member
May 10, 2022
18
meds 100% worth trying
-- avoid abilify at all costs, everyone EVERYONE i know has said its the most awful thing ever
im on lexapro rn
it doesnt make you happier, but it reduces the urges you have to hurt yourself / thoughts about killing yourself a lot
its really really nice
it makes you feel kind of invincible ? something super awful could happen in my life, like someone killing themselves in front of me and i think i would be totally fine
its not perfect though, when i first started i would get these bouts of severe nausea where i sometimes throw up wherever i was
but still totally worth it, over time the side effects went away completely
meds 100% worth trying
-- avoid abilify at all costs, everyone EVERYONE i know has said its the most awful thing ever
im on lexapro rn
it doesnt make you happier, but it reduces the urges you have to hurt yourself / thoughts about killing yourself a lot
its really really nice
it makes you feel kind of invincible ? something super awful could happen in my life, like someone killing themselves in front of me and i think i would be totally fine
its not perfect though, when i first started i would get these bouts of severe nausea where i sometimes throw up wherever i was
but still totally worth it, over time the side effects went away completely
also I have heard nothing but the most positive positive things about ketamine therapy, but that is a bit of an extreme alternative
 
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thermosgrenadine

thermosgrenadine

terror always ricochets
Feb 6, 2026
12
I need them and can't go off them if I want to be stable since I have bipolar 1 and psychosis/paranoia stuff
almost same boat! can i ask what you're on? i'm taking seroquel, lamictal xr, and zoloft to manage my bipolar + everything else
 
trying ungracefully

trying ungracefully

Student
Jun 11, 2025
176
almost same boat! can i ask what you're on? i'm taking seroquel, lamictal xr, and zoloft to manage my bipolar + everything else
I'm on Seroquel and lamictal too lol. Then gabapentin, paliperidone, Carbamazepine, and then Wellbutrin.
 
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23done

23done

Member
Aug 8, 2024
39
Bipolar 2 here and I mostly experience depression. Meds have kept me alive and functional. There are times where I am happy which is an improvement over no times where I am happy.
 
I

IWillSurvive

Member
Aug 28, 2023
14
I'm wondering if anyone here has any experience with medication (anti depressants?) and whether or not it has helped you.

My therapist recently referred me to a psychiatrist and hopefully sometime soon I will be able to have a consultation. I guess I suffer from depression/intense low moods/emptiness/suicidal thoughts continuously. I understand there is no magic med but sometimes I wonder if perhaps my mood were a bit better I would actually be able to do things and improve my life/overall wellbeing.

On the other side I'm also very scared because I don't want to worsen anything or become dependent.

I would really appreciate to hear anyone's experiences (positive or negative) or if someone has any helpful resources so I could do some own research before my appointment. Thanks!
Hey, I am just going to throw in my personal experience and opinions on here:

I started my meds around 4 months ago, started with a low dose of vortioxetine (5mg) and went up to the normal starting dose 16 days ago (10mgs)

I had and still have similar feelings to the ones you feel.

The first few month made the suicidal thoughts worsen a LOT, and it also hightened my emptiness to a very uncomfortable level. After the second month suicidal thoughts went down and emptiness got more stable but also constant. Not painfully empty, but constantly empty. Idk if I am making sense.

Now it has come to a point were the suicidal thoughts do come from time to time every day, but they are not there for the whole time. I also found that I was able to feel some things in my heart in december(it happened once, but I enjoyed it), so thats good. But yeah, as you may have inferred from the previous sentence, emptiness is a constant rn. I am also sleepier and more tired than usual....

Its supposed to get better after the 6th month, and I am currently going through the 4rth one, so we'll see.

My recommendation is to at least try... the alternative is staying empty and suicidal forever or just dying. And if like me you cant ctb rn because of either people around you or any other reason, then this is the only way you have to make survival bearable. Or at least thats how I see it. I know that my alternative is to either die or just living with the emptiness, and I know the second one is unsustainable...

I may give you and update if you want when I get to the 6th or 7th month. To either give some hope or realism xd.
 
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FoxSauce

FoxSauce

Emotionally unstable like an IKEA table
Aug 23, 2024
1,151
For me beneficial to keep my SI and my anxiety, depression and BPD in bay. Sometimes at the beggingin I didnt wanna take em but I need em so.

Ive taken a few like : Prozac, Vistaril, Wellbutrin, Mirtazapine, Trazodone and Doxepin.

For now that are working is - Effexor Buspirone and Lithium.
 
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orpheus_

orpheus_

Student
Apr 26, 2024
169
For me they made things a lot better, actually gave me hope that life can be worth it in *any* way. I was lucky, honestly. The first medication I got (Fluoxetine) worked for me, while sometimes people need to go test a few meds before they get anything that works. I started feeling pleasure and joy from time to time after a long time of not being to experience it at all and generally I became less suicidal, and just.. existing hurt less. Also got more energy, while before I would sleep all the time. I had no unpleasant side effects (luckily for me, no emotional numbing which SSRIs CAN cause in some cases, I actually started feeling anything other than despair again) besides total apetite loss at the beginning which was not a big issue anyway. Oh and also very vivid dreams, which weren't really unpleasant, just weird? Apparently many people get them on SSRIs??
I've been on Fluoxetine for around 1,5 year, got added Bupropion 8 months ago. It gave me more "physical" energy and drive. I'm just more often motivated to do anything. I think it made me more irritable, though, but it's not like, extreme. It's just on fluoxetine only I was the most chill guy on earth and now sometimes things annoy me but not to the point where I can't control it or anything. Honestly it's also hard to tell for me what was exactly caused by meds, and what was caused by my very unstable life situation during the last year, so it's all a bit generalized.

I still feel like shit a lot of the time but at least I get some good moments and have energy to maintain (mostly) normal functioning. I'd say it was worth it from the recovery viewpoint. Honestly I did not put much hope in meds and I was quite surprised how much that actually changed for me. I'd say it's worth trying. I have only tried two medications because for a very long time I didn't want to, and now once I got something that's working *at all* I'm afraid of switching it to something potentially better (although I was offered switching it a few times and maybe that could help), I'm just too fucking scared I will go back to not functioning at all.

The risks of taking a medication or severity of discontinuation always vary by substance. I always keep repeating that: RESEARCH the med you are prescribed before taking it. Know the most common side effects as well as its benefits, know how long it will likely take to work. That can help you determine whether the benefits outweigh the risks. Most basic antidepressants like SSRIs are low-risk though. But be more careful with antipsychotics (they are often prescribed off-label for different conditions than psychosis, and while they can help a lot, they can cause worse side effects and you need to asses the risk) and benzodiazepines (they are physically addictive, your body builds tolerance to them quickly and, while they can work great for panic attacks since they calm you down quickly, after a few hours the effect wears off and you feel worse than without them).
 
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cheesecakec

cheesecakec

Member
Feb 17, 2026
10
(edit: i didn't finish typing and i sent it ;-; )
TLDR: I have a lot of mixed feelings about meds. It helped me when I needed it most and I am trying to get back on them now. I think it's worth it to try and you can quit them if you want.

I have taken sertraline and escitalopram concurrently with a mood stabilizer I can't remember the name of (sorryyyy). Sertraline made me lose all of my energy, period. In a way, this was good because I wasn't actively having thoughts of harming myself and impulsively running away. This was bad because I need to work to pay rent and I wasn't even getting out of bed for work. I also had no motivation to feed myself or maintain my hygiene. -- But I did find days were I was okay and I would go out and do things like a normal person was. I was able to hold conversations without lashing out as well. I don't think sertraline was good for me, but I can see how it would be helpful for someone with more energy.

Escitalopram plus mystery mood stabilizer was great for me. I had the motivation and energy to live, but at the same time I noticed that I cared less for consequences and I'd stop showing up to work just because I didn't want to go. I'm not sure if this was an effect of the meds or an effect of me quitting therapy (at the time). I can't remember a whole lot of the period of time that I was on meds, which is probably some type of side effect of quitting them, but I would like to take them again.

I saw a few people talk about the withdrawal effects. Again, I'm not sure if my memory loss is related to quitting the meds since I've always had weird lapses in memory, but I haven't noticed anything majorly different. I liked my meds because it stopped me from acting impulsively, but it gave me a lot of trouble trying to maintain my job. This was a lot of words but uhh yeah
 
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daruino

odi et amo
Nov 9, 2025
90
I don't want to unnecessarily tag/reply to you all but I really appreciate all the experiences!! Very insightful, thank you!
 
M

MapleS

you are allowed to be a prolifer with me
May 22, 2025
167
If you will decide you will not take antidepressants you may try with mood stabilisers. They may help with being less intense bad
 
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