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mrtime87

Experienced
Jul 9, 2024
208
I need ideas on how I can realistically CTB in my own home without resorting to some crazy level of pain.

What are your plans to CTB?

If I could get a hold of SN that would be mine, but sadly I'm in America and haven't found a source that will respond.

I did try argon but didn't pass out from my exit bag. That was my go to method.

I have health concerns that I'm dealing with as well as permanent homelessness and want to die by my own hands rather than hypothermia and frostbite, or worse, starving in the streets.

Thanks.
 
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Sasukecel

Sasukecel

Member
Jul 14, 2024
35
I was going to try to slit my throat with a kitchen knife, or jump from a high place.

But I heard, that if you do the former, you could suffocate and the attempt can fail.
 
M

mrtime87

Experienced
Jul 9, 2024
208
I've stabbed myself before while delirious in the le upper left arm. It was pretty bloody but a rescue squad came out.

Strangely it wasn't a suicide attempt but I did begin to pass out once the blood was draining.

Just be careful because it does make a mess.
 
Sasukecel

Sasukecel

Member
Jul 14, 2024
35
I've stabbed myself before while delirious in the le upper left arm. It was pretty bloody but a rescue squad came out.

Strangely it wasn't a suicide attempt but I did begin to pass out once the blood was draining.

Just be careful because it does make a mess.
Thanks for the heads up, brocel.
 
sugarb

sugarb

thief of silent dreams
Jun 14, 2024
794
I need ideas on how I can realistically CTB in my own home without resorting to some crazy level of pain.

What are your plans to CTB?

If I could get a hold of SN that would be mine, but sadly I'm in America and haven't found a source that will respond.

I did try argon but didn't pass out from my exit bag. That was my go to method.

I have health concerns that I'm dealing with as well as permanent homelessness and want to die by my own hands rather than hypothermia and frostbite, or worse, starving in the streets.

Thanks.
My plan right now is
1. Keep up appearances / tell no one
2. Get driver's license (both to make getting to the gun store easier and so I have a photo ID)
3. Wait for an opportunity to drive to the gun store
4. Buy a gun
5. Wait until the right moment (possibly my birthday), go to a good place (somewhere windy and peaceful hopefully)
6. Shoot myself in the head
 
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M

mrtime87

Experienced
Jul 9, 2024
208
My plan right now is
1. Keep up appearances / tell no one
2. Get driver's license (both to make getting to the gun store easier and so I have a photo ID)
3. Wait for an opportunity to drive to the gun store
4. Buy a gun
5. Wait until the right moment (possibly my birthday), go to a good place (somewhere windy and peaceful hopefully)
6. Shoot myself in the head
This is where I messed up. I should have bought a gun when I had the chance.
 
sugarb

sugarb

thief of silent dreams
Jun 14, 2024
794
This is where I messed up. I should have bought a gun when I had the chance.
You'll probably get another chance sometime. And if you don't- there're plenty of fish in the CTB (haha).

If I may ask- how'd you miss your chance? Mental health invalidation? I've been worried about something like that happening to me but I've thankfully been careful enough to not out myself as suicidal thus far
 
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T

tone

Member
Jun 16, 2024
71
I've been unsuccessful with partial hanging, so I'm getting a gun to ctb instead.
 
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M

mrtime87

Experienced
Jul 9, 2024
208
I've been unsuccessful with partial hanging, so I'm getting a gun to ctb instead.
Same. Sadly I cannot get a gun because of my background check.
 
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S

sometimesoon

Student
Jul 9, 2024
127
hotel room - noose tied to my neck - the anchor on a portable chin-up bar on the door
 
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M

mrtime87

Experienced
Jul 9, 2024
208
hotel room - noose tied to my neck - the anchor on a portable chin-up bar on the door
Hopefully your method works.
You'll probably get another chance sometime. And if you don't- there're plenty of fish in the CTB (haha).

If I may ask- how'd you miss your chance? Mental health invalidation? I've been worried about something like that happening to me but I've thankfully been careful enough to not out myself as suicidal thus far
Psychiatric stays and eventually a felony in California.
 
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comabitvewombat

comabitvewombat

Comabat
Jun 7, 2024
7
I honestly have no idea anymore. I was going to order SN on an online store after reading a bit on this website, then I found out it was very illegal in Canada and decided against it. I tried driving out into the middle of nowhere and injecting over 100 units of insulin and drinking a bunch of vodka, but woke up 3 hours later shaking like crazy with a really weird, painful, sinking feeling, and I drove all the way back. I felt completely sober but I didn't think I'd be dying anytime soon if I stayed there. I also tried a whole bottle of tylenol but got zero symptoms despite google telling me it'd be different. I'm stuck now.
 
M

mrtime87

Experienced
Jul 9, 2024
208
I honestly have no idea anymore. I was going to order SN on an online store after reading a bit on this website, then I found out it was very illegal in Canada and decided against it. I tried driving out into the middle of nowhere and injecting over 100 units of insulin and drinking a bunch of vodka, but woke up 3 hours later shaking like crazy with a really weird, painful, sinking feeling, and I drove all the way back. I felt completely sober but I didn't think I'd be dying anytime soon if I stayed there. I also tried a whole bottle of tylenol but got zero symptoms despite google telling me it'd be different. I'm stuck now.
Same situation. I'm down to walking to the train tracks and throwing myself under the wheel. That's honestly it.
 
comabitvewombat

comabitvewombat

Comabat
Jun 7, 2024
7
Same situation. I'm down to walking to the train tracks and throwing myself under the wheel. That's honestly it.
I've been thinking of doing the same, but I saw some pretty brutal situations where the people survive. An instant beheading via train track would be ideal, but I'm terrified of a painful death. Honestly I've been thinking of approaching random junkies around my area to get a large amount of fent or meth but if that doesn't work i'd be fucked LOL
 
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M

mrtime87

Experienced
Jul 9, 2024
208
I've been thinking of doing the same, but I saw some pretty brutal situations where the people survive. An instant beheading via train track would be ideal, but I'm terrified of a painful death. Honestly I've been thinking of approaching random junkies around my area to get a large amount of fent or meth but if that doesn't work i'd be fucked LOL
Yeah good luck with that. You'll probably end up getting robbed.

I guess it comes down to a gun but I would have to make a slam shotgun which would be illegal. Im not even sure I could get the ammunition.
 

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