What are you all doing on the last few days before you ctb?

[vanillabug333]

I am in a PHP program right now, and I'm not even bothering to go tomorrow or Friday. What's even the point, you know? I'm just gonna chill with my cat and watch all of my favorite shows one last time. Probably get some good foods too. Why not? I'm ctb for sure on Saturday if all goes well, and I think it will. Might as well make my last few days as relaxing as possible, especially after all the hell I've been through.

 

[Uncounted1846]

I skipped the last day of IOP, my "graduation" because I knew it was utter BS and I was no where near ready for sessions to end. My depression has gotten worse since leaving IOP, not better.

I haven't thought about the few days before CTB. My date is for the end of May. I'll probably do the same thing as I do now, sleep the days away and stay up all night feeling like shit.

 

[bugbugbug]

I honestly just want to live as "normally" as possible, which for me is like @Uncounted1846 sleeping all day and being miserable at night. In the last few days, I hope to get some good food and hopefully finish IT and Mockingjay while engaging in activities I already promised to commit to. I honestly just want to be seen as "normal" as possible in the last few days, but I am debating on making videos to send to those I love on a scheduled message so maybe I'll do that as well.

 

[SummerTrip]

Hopefully I find someone I can chill with for the last days before CTB. Just talking about everything and nothing, watching stupid shit, drinking, smoking, laughing, doing whatever we want and finally ending it in peace.

 

[vanillabug333]

Hopefully I find someone I can chill with for the last days before CTB. Just talking about everything and nothing, watching stupid shit, drinking, smoking, laughing, doing whatever we want and finally ending it in peace.

That honestly sounds pretty pleasant ngl

 

[SummerTrip]

That honestly sounds pretty pleasant ngl

It does. I have everything ready. Methadone for two or more, multiple antiemetics, slow and short acting benzos for general mood and ending everything, and a safe space where we wouldn't be found for 24 hours for sure. I just want someone to share the experience with.
Don't want to go out on a whimper dying alone in my bed. Want to have a nice time with someone who understands the struggle and pain. The last party of our lives…

 

[socksnsandles]

nothing differently.

 

[inconclusivesorbet]

Hopefully I find someone I can chill with for the last days before CTB. Just talking about everything and nothing, watching stupid shit, drinking, smoking, laughing, doing whatever we want and finally ending it in peace.

How old are you? This sounds like a fun plan and pretty much how I'd want to go out too

 

[SummerTrip]

How old are you? This sounds like a fun plan and pretty much how I'd want to go out too

I'm 28 but I'm not from States or Europe

 

[ghosted1]

I'll probably relax and go outside. Plant some flowers so I can encourage some bees. Then spend a lot of time looking after my pet kitten. My dad lives nearby so he should be able to take her in when I'm gone. I'll try to take it easy, eat some food, write a note and then make sure things are set... let people know who I want telling and who I don't. Also I'll ask to be avenged. I may even curse my ex using an Etsy witch, who knows.

 

[Shadows From Hell]

I guess in my case, I'll be doing what I've always loved since it's what I'm planning... Biking, camping, fishing, hiking, then ending it.

 

[halfstay]

I'll probably just get lost in a state park or something and enjoy nature for a while, climb things no one's climbed, and just explore. I wanna be completely away from light pollution. just surrounded by earth. if I didn't have so much shame I'd probably do it all naked too but alas I'll just do it bare foot instead lol.

 

[l1ablemistakes]

im gonna donate my hair, i have enough of it and i wont be needing it anymore. plus, ive always been curious to see how id look with a pixie cut. im also gonna donate blood if im eligible. im scared of needles but im willing to endure it if im about to die anyway, i may as well give back as much as i can. ill make sure everything is tidy, get my affairs in order (ie. wipe my presence here, delete passwords i dont want people seeing, finish writing notes if i havent already). donate any clothes i dont want that i dont think my friends will take (i have quite the fashion collection and i want them all to have it). by this point my will should be written so i wont have to give away any big ticket items.

in the weeks before im gonna try to see as many people as i can and give them the happiest version of myself. i already feel at peace with my decision and im sure by then the elation of knowing itll be over soon will get me out of this sinkhole im in and let me give my friends some happy memories one last time. ill spend plenty of time with my cat.

the day of will be like any other day. my partner and roommate will go to work and i will call in sick. then my plan will happen. if things go the way i hope, my partner and roommate wont have to find me.

 

[vampyrzelda]

Hoping to try LSD before I go.