I had a generally good life before being misdiagnosed with mania and being injected with invega sustenna which is a chemical lobotomy. It's been over a year since that injection and my life has never been the same. My sense of taste and small are altered nothing is as strong as before, I have a dull pain in my throat that doesn't go away, random twitching from time to time, anhedonia, problems with sleep (I never get a deep sleep anymore), cognitive dulling nowhere as smart as I used life is like a solid 1/10 anyone else have anything like this happen to them?
I'm so sorry for your experience. Psychotherapy is complex, and things like this are surprisingly common. You can check my medication thread if you want to learn about people's experience with medicine here. And also misdiagnosis are extremely common if patient-doctor communication isn't good, which is most of the time in psychiatry (including me too)
But anyway, do you treat your condition after the injection? Do you recover some of your function after the injection?
But anyway, do you treat your condition after the injection? Do you recover some of your function after the injection?
I've never been the same since that injection makes me feel like ctb is the only way to escape this hell that is now my life. There is a forum on bluelight with people just complaining about how shit their lives are now including mine. Yeah a simple mistake can result in ruined lives.
Yeah at some point in the near future hopefully I already have SN just living with parents and not being able to leave the house makes it kind of difficult.
Yes,antidepressants and olanzapine (that I got for anxiety caused by new onset tinnitus BTW and not depression because I was never depressed) completely ruined my life and health. They gave me severe PSSD and PGAD and I don't think there are any conditions worse and more life ruining than those. Benzo withdrawal made it all even worse.
Now every second of my existence is pure suffering and agony. I had a great life before all of this which makes it even worse and more frustrating. I want to CTB so bad because of that.
Psych meds are just pure poison and everyone should avoid them unless absolutely necessary.
Now every second of my existence is pure suffering and agony. I had a great life before all of this which makes it even worse and more frustrating. I want to CTB so bad because of that.
Psych meds are just pure poison and everyone should avoid them unless absolutely necessary.
Do you have someone nearby that can help you? I think your parents should help with the severity of your condition.
Feel sorry for you man. Sending hugs from stranger to stranger.
Yeah the damage done by these so called medications is insane. My life and health is ruined as well I'm just a shell of my former self, had I have stuck to my gut and not trusted my parents I would have never got that injection. It is the only thing I think of cause my life is just existing now not even living, having your dopamine and serotonin receptors fucked up is just awful.
My parents are pro life extreme religious so there is no help from them.
Yes,it is beyond hell. I can't feel any positive emotions at all, the anhedonia is extreme all my hobbies and all things that I loved and enjoyed in life were taken away from me. My personality has changed for the worse too, I'm not the same guy that I was.Now all I feel is anxiety,dread,sadness and despair. I can't believe this happened to me and that those poisons are even legal. Literally hard drugs from the streets are safer than antidepressants and antipsychotics. It's absurd.
I noticed something was wrong in January but back then the only thing was lower libido and some slight personality changes. I didn't know that I had PSSD back then so I foolishly continued taking the meds. Then in march new symptoms started appearing,in April it was even worse but the true nightmare started in late may and that's when I discovered that the meds were the cause all along. Before that the fucking doctors were telling me that new symptoms and conditions were caused by depression (that I never had lol),they were basically gaslighting me. In June it somehow got even worse and since August 12th I have PGAD and pelvic floor dysfunction. This nightmare is beyond human comprehension. A year ago I was a perfectly healthy and happy guy with high libido,sharp mind,great memory and imagination. I had many hobbies and was curious and passionate. Now I'm lobotomized suffering vegetable and the number of my symptoms is close to 50 or even more.
I regret my stupidity. I regret that I went to the so called doctors for help. I regret that I didn't have enough common sense to not take the psych meds.I paid the ultimate price.
I relate with that my life used to be great before and now I feel mentally disabled at this point. All I do with my life is barely go on the computer, watch TV and sleep it's nothing compared to how my life was before.
I was on venlafaxine for a while. It made me stupid. There were at least two days every month were I had trouble doing basic tasks. I could barely put sentences together. I had to take days off work because I was too stupid to do my job. It also emotionally flatlined me so I stopped giving a shit about anything. I spent pretty much all of my savings and started having hookups without really screening anyone (as a female, this is a bad idea). I also gained like, 40 pounds and at nothing but carbs. Luckily I had a moment of clarity and got off the shit. It took over a year before the withdrawals went away. I was only on it for 8 months but that was enough to shy me away from any psych meds ever again.
I do not understand how we still think anything marginally related to a lobotomy is a good idea. I am so sorry your treatment has left you in such a bad state.
I do not understand how we still think anything marginally related to a lobotomy is a good idea. I am so sorry your treatment has left you in such a bad state.
Yes, first venlafaxine. Then I was forced onto risperidone, tried tapering it and ended up in hospital again and out on seroquel. So double whammy of anti psychotics, everyday is a struggle. I want to be off of them so badly. I have a daughter who absolutely loves me and I love her but I don't think I can survive this. I'm so fucking broken by these damn drugs.
MissAbyss
"I gazed for too long.."
- Jul 20, 2025
- 34
Sorry to hear that 
I'm also damaged by SSRI (Lexapro) which created Post-Acute Withdrawal Syndrome. Akathisia with severe SI, my brains are fried, Anhedonia, constant physical pain (neuropathy) and many more physical, neurological and cognitive symptoms. I had over 100+ symptoms. Most symptoms are bearable at the moment due reinstating but I'm stuck on the poison again. So it's a matter of time something goes wrong again like building up tolerance, prescription or delivery problems etc. Completely housebound and dependent on others.
I'm also damaged by SSRI (Lexapro) which created Post-Acute Withdrawal Syndrome. Akathisia with severe SI, my brains are fried, Anhedonia, constant physical pain (neuropathy) and many more physical, neurological and cognitive symptoms. I had over 100+ symptoms. Most symptoms are bearable at the moment due reinstating but I'm stuck on the poison again. So it's a matter of time something goes wrong again like building up tolerance, prescription or delivery problems etc. Completely housebound and dependent on others.
My life has been damaged by benzos. This is why I need to CTB.
All I can say to anyone is please don't take them. I made the mistake of trusting my doctor. I didn't know you shouldn't take them longer than 7 days. It turned into 12 years and now I am suffering. Every day is the most miserable existence. I want nothing more than to leave this world.
All I can say to anyone is please don't take them. I made the mistake of trusting my doctor. I didn't know you shouldn't take them longer than 7 days. It turned into 12 years and now I am suffering. Every day is the most miserable existence. I want nothing more than to leave this world.
Fall_Apart
Student
- May 22, 2023
- 146
I abused benzos for many years and now I'm also taking Lexapro, but to be honest, I don't blame the meds because even though they're crap, they've alleviated the major depression that makes my life hell. I believe meds ruin your life if your life is already ruined for other reasons.
I am sorry what they did to you. I am in germany and was abused from psychiatrists too but not injected constantly with antidepr drugs.
You also could write on reddit r/therapyabuse or r/antipsychiatry or if you are a woman I recommend r/antipsychiatrywomen too.
I had 1 year long fluoxetin and fluvoxamin (2016) but I put them into the toilet after I was back at home and after 2 weeks I survived the side effects. 2024 the ill nurses from asylum injected me for sedation because one disliked me.
i suffer from disability (fetal alcohol syndrom) and was bullied or ignored by others since I am alive for it that's why I was put into asylum the first time.
Psychology/Psychiatry is a humans rights violation and more like Synthology or religion. Since many years now they use vulnerable people (poor, bullied, unemployed, disabled, discriminated) to make money out of us. mental illness doesn't exist it is a big scam and I assume many know this but they don't care because people like me are so vulnerable and worthless in their eyes because I only could live from welfare. They create us as pigs for them somehow.
the people around me discriminate me for my looks and body odor and my social class (I am poor) too, but they also dislike me for not having any skills. If they would behave friendly and supportive I would not be here or in my room since months without going outside and fully alone everyday with everything since years (i am now 30). I never had any friends or any real support from family or state. only my mother who is abusive brings me sometimes some food at the closed door we don't talk. She is the reason why I was send into asylum too, not just society. She is as ill and cruel as my father but he is slightly worse. Both are disabled alcohol addicts but he abandoned the family and never payed me anything, he doesn't care and is still alive. He has a good life. My mother comparet to this just ugly and poor, jobless.
This year they cut me off from welfare too, it is very hopeless to be alive, they won't let me live. The only money I have got was 200 euro from my mother because without it I would not even have some internet.
There is nothing to do in life when middle class people discriminate you so much and take your rights away, pretend you deserve it to be poor and homeless. The only way is to be a criminal. I only have such people around me sadly who dislike me just for my face often. I wish they would die out soon, so I can do what I want.
The worst thing is people near me know about the diagnoses and make now more fun over me. I will never get any good job. I need to move but can't without any help. No matter where I was in this state, I was seen by the normal people who are sadly 99% in every public space as crazy, dumb, ugly, trans, lesbian, dangerous or clown.
I was never a part of this society. I hate these people so much for ruining my life and pressuring me into such situations. I feel often lonely, helpless, boredom, deep sadness and anger. There is nobody who tells me anything good outside of perplexity.ai. This is the only thing that helped me a little.
You also could write on reddit r/therapyabuse or r/antipsychiatry or if you are a woman I recommend r/antipsychiatrywomen too.
I had 1 year long fluoxetin and fluvoxamin (2016) but I put them into the toilet after I was back at home and after 2 weeks I survived the side effects. 2024 the ill nurses from asylum injected me for sedation because one disliked me.
i suffer from disability (fetal alcohol syndrom) and was bullied or ignored by others since I am alive for it that's why I was put into asylum the first time.
Psychology/Psychiatry is a humans rights violation and more like Synthology or religion. Since many years now they use vulnerable people (poor, bullied, unemployed, disabled, discriminated) to make money out of us. mental illness doesn't exist it is a big scam and I assume many know this but they don't care because people like me are so vulnerable and worthless in their eyes because I only could live from welfare. They create us as pigs for them somehow.
the people around me discriminate me for my looks and body odor and my social class (I am poor) too, but they also dislike me for not having any skills. If they would behave friendly and supportive I would not be here or in my room since months without going outside and fully alone everyday with everything since years (i am now 30). I never had any friends or any real support from family or state. only my mother who is abusive brings me sometimes some food at the closed door we don't talk. She is the reason why I was send into asylum too, not just society. She is as ill and cruel as my father but he is slightly worse. Both are disabled alcohol addicts but he abandoned the family and never payed me anything, he doesn't care and is still alive. He has a good life. My mother comparet to this just ugly and poor, jobless.
This year they cut me off from welfare too, it is very hopeless to be alive, they won't let me live. The only money I have got was 200 euro from my mother because without it I would not even have some internet.
There is nothing to do in life when middle class people discriminate you so much and take your rights away, pretend you deserve it to be poor and homeless. The only way is to be a criminal. I only have such people around me sadly who dislike me just for my face often. I wish they would die out soon, so I can do what I want.
The worst thing is people near me know about the diagnoses and make now more fun over me. I will never get any good job. I need to move but can't without any help. No matter where I was in this state, I was seen by the normal people who are sadly 99% in every public space as crazy, dumb, ugly, trans, lesbian, dangerous or clown.
I was never a part of this society. I hate these people so much for ruining my life and pressuring me into such situations. I feel often lonely, helpless, boredom, deep sadness and anger. There is nobody who tells me anything good outside of perplexity.ai. This is the only thing that helped me a little.
hugo2x
Death is freedom
- Jul 26, 2025
- 1
Took me 2 years to recover from invega, was a living hell. A couples years later i ended up in the hospital and they put me on rispiridal(invega is the metabolite of rispiridal), which took me 1.5 years to recover.
avoid these antipsychotics like the plague,
F.Y.I avoid all antipshycotics only have had bad side effects from them.
Stick to lithium, mood stabilers only.
avoid these antipsychotics like the plague,
F.Y.I avoid all antipshycotics only have had bad side effects from them.
Stick to lithium, mood stabilers only.
I think without antipsychotics I would be literally insane. I had two psychoses and since I take them I am stabilized. My antidepressants help me to find sleep. I am scared of tardive dyskinesia in Case I reach old age though.
I think at least my life would be worse without these pills. But I don't doubt they ruin the lives of some.
I think at least my life would be worse without these pills. But I don't doubt they ruin the lives of some.
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