Discussion Unstable relationships

[xkonstantinexx]

I've been told that the reason why I've never been able to hold on to a stable relationship is because I seek constant validation due to my abusive father.

I've lost the only woman that I felt could make me happy because of this.

Has anyone else experienced something similar?

 

[Neowise]

Similar but not similar... rather the contrary.
Instead of seeking validation I constantly downgrade, trashtalk and criticise myself and my abilities. I want to lower the expectations people have for me so that I don't disappoint them to a point I am annoying them.

I am aware of it and sometimes I try to curb it, but especially on days I am felling down I can't help but make negative jokes about myself.

 

[Hurt]

I stopped being interested in relationships because which woman could be interested in a man who wants to kill himself everyday. It's pointless.

 

[xkonstantinexx]

Similar but not similar... rather the contrary.
Instead of seeking validation I constantly downgrade, trashtalk and criticise myself and my abilities. I want to lower the expectations people have for me so that I don't disappoint them to a point I am annoying them.

I am aware of it and sometimes I try to curb it, but especially on days I am felling down I can't help but make negative jokes about myself.

I do the exact same thing but I do it with hope that people would tell me otherwise, tell me that I'm wrong and try to cheer me up by telling me good things about myself. Constantly doing this to my partners has pushed them all away.

I stopped being interested in relationships because which woman could be interested in a man who wants to kill himself everyday. It's pointless.

Do you feel like it would make a difference if you found someone who wanted to support you during your times of need?

 

[Huntfish34]

Im on the contrary also.......... Especially at work, but everyday life in general also. Talking shit , downgrading, negative things about myself. A true self-hatred I suppose, but Ive been like this for so many years of my life I guess I just dont know Any different. I hate it, very destructive to say the least.

 

[xkonstantinexx]

Im on the contrary also.......... Especially at work, but everyday life in general also. Talking shit , downgrading, negative things about myself. A true self-hatred I suppose, but Ive been like this for so many years of my life I guess I just dont know Any different. I hate it, very destructive to say the least.

I know what you mean.

Someone asked me yesterday if I wanted help, I said I don't know even know what normal feels like anymore. How am I supposed to know what I want when I don't even know what it is?

 

[alwaysSuffering]

I don't know even know what normal feels like anymore. How am I supposed to know what I want when I don't even know what it is?

I can relate to this statement 100%. I have no idea what normal is. I don't think I've ever come close to experiencing it and I don't think I ever will.

 

[xkonstantinexx]

I can relate to this statement 100%. I have no idea what normal is. I don't think I've ever come close to experiencing it and I don't think I ever will.

I was sober for a few days last week, slept with the help of sleeping pills and antidepressants. I'd wake up feeling groggy, tired and jaded. So bloody jaded that I craved to feel something even if it's pain. If this is normal, then I want nothing of it.