If I had to choose what to do before my ctb, I'd definitely go eat the best food I can think of! For me it would be italian pizza, holy shit how delicious that shit is
I plan to go fancy restaurant. First and last time in my life.
Like nothing else much-I am pretty much non functional. Play some PC game of my childhood(is 26yo and still runs on WIn10!)
I am making peace with myself on inside that it must be now like that bcuz I was stupix and naive to trust NHS/doctors. I have to write few letters, address them, ppick up funeral outfit, write list of how I wish my funeral to be/cremation wish & burial wish.
I need to secure my only legal liability-my child(fur baby).
I need to sort it all out, pack things, pack books, clean flat. Clean everything. Sort out extra cash for landlord as he will have to sort out my property(aka donate it somewhere) bcuz he has no idea where I am going x when. Like normal stuff. I had plans x dreams about own business and move abroad, but NHS activity in past 4-5 years(and last 2-3 the worst) ruined me, health, finances, everything. Like it was already bad bcuz they were at it for past 10.5 years, but you know. Imagine you break leg in one place-and you think it can;t be worse. Then you break leg in 2 places bczu drs messed up first time. You think the same-can;t be worse, bbcuz is already worse than last time. Then you break your leg as open fracture and this is when you realise how you were treated. My story. Yout hink its bad, but it keeps getting worse. The worst? Is zero of my own fault in there. I told them exactly what issue was, what I needed x wanted, and they blatantly dismissed me, denied me my reality/medically gaslighted me
