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traintracks.mp3

traintracks.mp3

it wears me out
Mar 4, 2024
33
I felt a bit better for a long time, explaining my absence on this site, but unfortunately it was short lived. I have another infection and the pain is back, leaving me to wonder why the doctors even keep me alive. They always give words of pity when I explain my situation and my age, saying "you're too young, I'm so sorry." Unfortunately it only serves to remind me that while most other girls my age are in college, athletes, physically healthy, I have nothing to do but wait as my body slowly breaks down. The doctors say I should be able to function relatively normally, but what part about this is normal? How do I go back to my regular life knowing it only gets worse?

So yet again they are going to replace another part of me, turn me into a horrible mesh of metal and human. And I am expected to be grateful to be alive.
 
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