It was the big reason why I couldn't make the jump the last time. Or catch the bus, whatever the fuck the lingo is here. I don't know and I don't care. Well, I picked a stupid method anyway. Suffocation is easy but horrifying. I want to be able to see the sky before I go. And friends will be there for you in a suicidal crisis. But they don't be there for you for the other crisis, the grinding horror of living day by day in a life that has run out of potential.
And now I am on the same stupid plausibly deniable merry-go-round of trying to figure out what the fuck DSL is and how I can get hold of the easiest passport towards the end. Well, it's not like I have a deadline to meet. I can figure this out. Humans only live for so long anyway. Apparently I didn't get the fucking hint that I was meant to be alone all the other times the universe delivered this truth bomb to me. Well I have gotten the message.
This time, I won't try to record a note. There will be no message. Leaving a message gives you the illusion that you have something to stay for. No one gives a fuck when the crisis is over. They are living their own separate lives apart from you. They will not walk the grinding path with you. Why would they, when they have happy lives to live? No one is going to wait for your miserable ass to catch up. There is no need for closure. They will forget about you anyway.
And it's high time I was forgotten.
And now I am on the same stupid plausibly deniable merry-go-round of trying to figure out what the fuck DSL is and how I can get hold of the easiest passport towards the end. Well, it's not like I have a deadline to meet. I can figure this out. Humans only live for so long anyway. Apparently I didn't get the fucking hint that I was meant to be alone all the other times the universe delivered this truth bomb to me. Well I have gotten the message.
This time, I won't try to record a note. There will be no message. Leaving a message gives you the illusion that you have something to stay for. No one gives a fuck when the crisis is over. They are living their own separate lives apart from you. They will not walk the grinding path with you. Why would they, when they have happy lives to live? No one is going to wait for your miserable ass to catch up. There is no need for closure. They will forget about you anyway.
And it's high time I was forgotten.
