Sometimes it’s hard for me to fully comprehend non-existence, the fact that I will never exist ever again, no second chances

[Siamese Believe]

To simply no longer exist, I always just shrugged this off. But as I'm drawing closer to death than ever, I've been forced to think deeper about the true implications of this more.

Consciousness is really hard to let go of, even when you really want to. It's like a drug that you hate and know is wrong but you can't stop doing it. Non-existence does scare me a bit, even though there's not much logic behind this fear.

To never feel, to never see, to never touch, to never eat, to never laugh, to never see, to never learn, do anything, ever again. And finally get to be free of this disgusting body. It's as liberating as it is frightening because this life is all I've ever known since I came to exist.

No one is born suicidal of course. Many of us never could've imagined that things would ever get to this point, but it happens. I once thought I'd go to college and make it big, get a successful career and live in a beautiful suburban neighborhood, or out in a wooded area.

I can't tell you what this feeling is, I guess there is no true closure because once you're gone you're just gone. I get no true compensation for my suffering, I simply won't exist. Just like I didn't exist for trillions of years before I did.

And at the end of the day we don't know what any of this is. What it means to exist, what is absolute true nothingness, what makes your consciousness yours, what is consciousness.

This world is all I've ever known, and it's all I ever will know, when I die. You all will continue and I won't. From my perspective, the world has gone with me.

This is one of many reasons why I truly believe that it's selfish to give birth. Life is the most addictive and harmful drug, a drug so powerful that the thought of parting from it permanently sparks a destructive fear. When realistically death is the best rehab for the drug called life.

 

[Forever Sleep]

It is a strange idea but then, we kind of 'disappear' each night when we go to sleep so- to some extent, maybe it's not so totally alien. Just that one day, we'll do that and not wake up!

But yeah, I remember talking to my God parents once- saying- isn't it weird that we're alive and conscious? That we have this awareness of being alive? I think they thought I was crazy because, maybe they just accepted it as the status quo.

In a way though, it helps on the one hand to think it's not exactly unique. Billions of creatures have realised they were alive... till they weren't. It's just unfortunate if anything- from my perspective that this was inflicted on 'me'. But then- it won't last forever.

Plus, while it can feel kind of weird and scary, the time prior to birth wasn't scary. Wasn't anything. So- if it's like that, we'll be just fine. Quite possibly, here one moment, gone the next.

 

[pthnrdnojvsc]

All my opinion:

all I am is my brain, brain cells , chemical reactions.

the brain creates a model of a self

the brain creates a feeling of consciousness

there is no self only brain cells and connections

but I'm also a brain that can suffer unending constant unbearable pain

1 second after my brain dies I will cease to exist forever

Non-existence forever is the ultimate bliss no extreme suffering or pain ever

trillions of animals and humans have had this horror happen to them of being able to see this terrible world and to suffer unbearable pain

Frontiers | The Attention Schema Theory: A Foundation for Engineering Artificial Consciousness

The purpose of the attention schema theory is to explain how an information-processing device, the brain, arrives at the claim that it possesses a non-physic...

www.frontiersin.org

I agree with neurosciencetist eagleman.

Every experience is rewiring reprogramming your brain a little.

Your Brain Makes You a Different Person Every Day

Our brains are wired for new sensations.

nautil.us

You have 70,000 thoughts every day

Life is an addiction .

Every time i eat a bite of delicious food and get a rush of pleasure I am becoming more addicted to food and to life the more general addiction

Same for every time I watch a clicbait youtube video , or see a "pretty " scene, or get a good feeling i get more addicted to youtube videos and to life .

Its like a hoarder or a crack or heroin addict

i think life is an addiction. so are all these sub addictions like for example watching clickbait youtube videos, social media , news and other garbage addictions. but these become pleasuarable after repeating them so many times. every time i indulge in a pleausure addiction i become more addicted to life and to the sub addiction.

conscoiusness is a trick an illusion . there is no self only a brain and brain cells
consciousness to me is a horror. it's an evil trick.. it makes you think you are important the center of everything and this is hypertrophied to the trillionth power by the cutlture society media. never once are we told that imo the truth is i every human is just a brain. it's an evil illusion and not as smart as people think mostly a programmed brain a habit mind.

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

I get no true compensation for my suffering, I simply won't exist

Yeah, this is the hard part. There's no relief. It just ends.

 

[badatparties]

Sounds great to me. There are much scarier possibilities to worry about.

It is a strange idea but then, we kind of 'disappear' each night when we go to sleep so- to some extent, maybe it's not so totally alien. Just that one day, we'll do that and not wake up!

But yeah, I remember talking to my God parents once- saying- isn't it weird that we're alive and conscious? That we have this awareness of being alive? I think they thought I was crazy because, maybe they just accepted it as the status quo.

In a way though, it helps on the one hand to think it's not exactly unique. Billions of creatures have realised they were alive... till they weren't. It's just unfortunate if anything- from my perspective that this was inflicted on 'me'. But then- it won't last forever.

Plus, while it can feel kind of weird and scary, the time prior to birth wasn't scary. Wasn't anything. So- if it's like that, we'll be just fine. Quite possibly, here one moment, gone the next.

Right, billions of people have come and gone. I feel like it takes some hubris to think your individual consciousness is so special that it goes on forever. I could be wrong though, WTH do i know.