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dogdrool

dogdrool

Member
Dec 2, 2025
62
Very short post but I just wanted to make a quick one about my weird (but maybe not uncommon) self-harm triggers.

I've self harmed inconsistently since I was 12. I was clean for a few years (sorta) after getting caught but was ultimately triggered by a partner I had who liked to cut on their face. The more visible the cuts are, the more I want them. When I was younger I used to cut up my hands and I have been so desperate to have a go at my face. Any sort of cuts on the hands. face or lower legs (anywhere likely to be visible) is an immediate trigger for me.
My second biggest trigger is if I'm going to see people! I could be clean for weeks but the moment I know that I'm going to go to a pub with friends or any sort of location where it's warm enough for unrolled sleeves, I feel the need to cut. I don't want to look clean. I want it to be very visible that I've been struggling, eventhough it hasn't mattered in the past. I'm supposed to be booking myself in for a tattoo soon, but I genuinely can't help but cut because I'm going out on thursday with people I haven't seen in a long time (which makes it even more enticing).

In short, I guess a lot of my desires in terms of self harm relates to the way in which other people will percieve it or me, which is kind of fucked up but, whatever.
 
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