Oh boy self harm

[Emilyismew]

I'm kinda feeling it I won't lie. I have not cut myself since I was 18. I took pride on it I bragged about it. I've been going through these times where my emotions are empty. And then my hearts starts to beat feel fast and it hurts. And I want more. It feels so heavy. And I just want to find something and scape my skin. Then I'll want more.. and more. It's so hard. I don't know how long I can hold out. I really don't.

 

[Spacing Out]

Honestly, I know exactly what you mean. I went a really long time (at least 5 years, I would say, which is decent) and around Christmas relapsed. I know firsthand that you can't stop someone, but I can tell you that I don't recommend it (obviously), mostly because it really is hard to stop again... when you quit the first time, did you learn any tips to not do it? Such as the elastic trick, ice, doodling on yourself (I find red ink helps bc it simulates blood, somehow, but that's personal), or similar things?

Whatever you do or don't do, please know that you aren't a bad person for it. The urges are strong and I believe in you <3 but also remember safety when doing so, and what the intention is. I would say DM me if you like, but I don't have 5 posts yet, unfortunately...

 

[Anon2662]

I know exactly how you feel getting those urges. I managed to stop for a few months after my self harm was escalating and getting scary, but the urges came back strong and I gave in to them.. It sounds like you managed to stop for longer than I did and that sounds like something positive that you should definitely be proud of! :)

Have you heard of the app calm harm? A MH professional recommended it to me.. I won't lie, I didn't actually use it because when I want to hurt myself I'm not in the right frame of mind to help myself.. but i know it has helped some people so maybe it could be something to look into if you want to fight the urges.

 

[Spacing Out]

I know exactly how you feel getting those urges. I managed to stop for a few months after my self harm was escalating and getting scary, but the urges came back strong and I gave in to them.. It sounds like you managed to stop for longer than I did and that sounds like something positive that you should definitely be proud of! :)

Have you heard of the app calm harm? A MH professional recommended it to me.. I won't lie, I didn't actually use it because when I want to hurt myself I'm not in the right frame of mind to help myself.. but i know it has helped some people so maybe it could be something to look into if you want to fight the urges.

Not OP, but what does the app do? I'm sure I would be quite in the right frame of mind to help myself either, but it could be nice to have at hand.

 

[qwerty32]

I know someone who worked in a psych unit and they had to watch out people who would take anything and use it to cut themselves. Some of the patients cut themselves because it gave them something to do and there were some patients who did it unconsciously where it wasn't there fault. They sometimes use their fingernails.

Better to get something to keep busy in your hands like a stressball to keep the fingers busy. That's what I always hear.

 

[Anon2662]

Not OP, but what does the app do? I'm sure I would be quite in the right frame of mind to help myself either, but it could be nice to have at hand.

It basically gives you activities to help you 'ride the wave'.. you pick 5 or 10 minute activities and there are heaps to choose from.. Its not actually a bad app, I just never use it at the right times because I'm not in the right frame of mind.
There is also a sister app called calm fear which is meant to help me with my panic attacks too.. might be useful for some :)

@Emilyismew feel free to Pm me if you ever just want a distraction from your urges :)

 

[Isittimetogonola]

A staple gun..

 

[Oh so tired]

I'm kinda feeling it I won't lie. I have not cut myself since I was 18. I took pride on it I bragged about it. I've been going through these times where my emotions are empty. And then my hearts starts to beat feel fast and it hurts. And I want more. It feels so heavy. And I just want to find something and scape my skin. Then I'll want more.. and more. It's so hard. I don't know how long I can hold out. I really don't.

I'm kinda feeling it I won't lie. I have not cut myself since I was 18. I took pride on it I bragged about it. I've been going through these times where my emotions are empty. And then my hearts starts to beat feel fast and it hurts. And I want more. It feels so heavy. And I just want to find something and scape my skin. Then I'll want more.. and more. It's so hard. I don't know how long I can hold out. I really don't.

OP I'm sorry you're struggling with this. I understand the urges to sh, they are so hard to ignore. You are amazing to have managed to give up for a period of time! If you can manage to resist this time then do it as once you start again it can quickly escalate. I'm out of control with it at the moment. If you ever want to talk with someone who understands, I am here.