No one cares when I tell them about my Si

[Vesusboy]

I think If i tried, I could get over my suicidal thoughts. Or If i keep being apathetic towards everything I won't be able to care enough to go through with it. But it hurts no one in my life cares that I'm like this

I've told everyone in my life im suicidal. And they dont take me seriously. They don't even react sometimes. They just keep talking. Once I cried for hours over the phone with a friend and the next day she told me to stop emotionally manipulating her. They dont think im serious. Maybe I'm not. I want to be now. I dont want to get better and then everyone looks at this time of my life and thinks oh see he was totally fine. Im so deeply hurt by everyone around me for not caring, it makes me not want to be around them anymore. Which makes me feel so much worse

I feel like I have to do it now. So people know I was serious. I just don't want to fuck it up and live, because that's humiliating. But I want so badly to be taken seriously. If thats what it takes at this point

 

[fedup1982]

They don't sound nice. I'm grateful nobody has treated me like that in 20 years. The last time was a long time ago. Find nicer people

 

[Vesusboy]

I want to, its just a very unstable time to make new friends. I dont wanna go hey. Lets be friends. Btw. I really wish someone would come kill me

 

[effemel]

Yeah I kinda feel the same, no one cares enough to actually intervene and talk about it, at the same time though, I've been saying I want to ctb for years without a proper way to do it, so I guess they're conditioned to thinking that I'll still be alive? But now that I'm going to go through with it after getting SN, they'll see that I was 100% serious.

My parents also just don't get it, when I say I want to die they'll try to spin it around on me and say that I'd probably be happier if they died or I don't care about them or wtv.

 

[purpp37]

They won't care until you're dead and even if you do die they'll eventually stop caring so either way it doesn't really matter

 

[violetforever]

I feel like I have to do it now. So people know I was serious.

at least do it mostly on your own terms and time. don't be impulsive about it for the sake of other people who don't even care or believe you will do it. i'm speaking from my own realizations.

 

[floatingair]

Sorry to hear that. Though you also have to think about it from their perspective. Most people have been probably suicidal at least once in their life so its not anything new. Maybe they think you are just saying it for attention. Either way, you should not rely on others for your own mental health. What do you expect to get out of talking to your closest people about it? What do you want them to do? At the end of the day only you can determine if life is worth living. I think she said "stop emotional manipulation" because she thinks she is expected to treat you better or something to stop you from doing it. Instead, you probably just wanted someone to talk to about the troubles of life.

You should not take an action because of others peoples opinion on you.

Why do you want to CTB if you don't mind sharing?

 

[capi]

Sorry to hear that. Though you also have to think about it from their perspective. Most people have been probably suicidal at least once in their life so its not anything new. Maybe they think you are just saying it for attention. Either way, you should not rely on others for your own mental health. What do you expect to get out of talking to your closest people about it? What do you want them to do? At the end of the day only you can determine if life is worth living. I think she said "stop emotional manipulation" because she thinks she is expected to treat you better or something to stop you from doing it. Instead, you probably just wanted someone to talk to about the troubles of life.

You should not take an action because of others peoples opinion on you.

Why do you want to CTB if you don't mind sharing?

This is not good. Having a support system in times of crisis is bare essentials of being a human. Thats how people recover. Every therapist will say this.

When you asked "what do you expect them to do?" Well, first off, people shouldnt assume suicidal people are attention seeking. Thats horrible.
Second of all, they shouldnt push that they are manipulating them when they are literally in a crisis.

EVERY ADVICE PEOPLE GIVE TO SUICIDAL PEOPLE IS TO REACH OUT FOR HELP.

When someone literally cries on the phone its so incredibly hurtful to literally ignore them or say they are manipulative when they are in active agony. This guy literally just wanted support. Friends ARE supposed to help you feel better.

 

[floatingair]

This is not good. Having a support system in times of crisis is bare essentials of being a human. Thats how people recover. Every therapist will say this.

When you asked "what do you expect them to do?" Well, first off, people shouldnt assume suicidal people are attention seeking. Thats horrible.
Second of all, they shouldnt push that they are manipulating them when they are literally in a crisis.

EVERY ADVICE PEOPLE GIVE TO SUICIDAL PEOPLE IS TO REACH OUT FOR HELP.

When someone literally cries on the phone its so incredibly hurtful to literally ignore them or say they are manipulative when they are in active agony. This guy literally just wanted support. Friends ARE supposed to help you feel better.

Your right, I shouldn't have said that. Everybody needs a support system, and friends should be there to pull you up, not turn you away.

I don't have many friends so I just have a hard time thinking what they are supposed to do to assist. After all, only you can make life better, only you can turn a seemingly negative situation into a positive one. Also it seems to me like the OP is focusing too much on what their friends think of them, when they don't look like friends in the first place. It might make you happier to cut off those people who didn't take the time to hear you out, instead of feeling like you have to do it now. Cut those people who didn't care about you at your worst, and focus on getting better.

 

[joey2424]

I think If i tried, I could get over my suicidal thoughts. Or If i keep being apathetic towards everything I won't be able to care enough to go through with it. But it hurts no one in my life cares that I'm like this

I've told everyone in my life im suicidal. And they dont take me seriously. They don't even react sometimes. They just keep talking. Once I cried for hours over the phone with a friend and the next day she told me to stop emotionally manipulating her. They dont think im serious. Maybe I'm not. I want to be now. I dont want to get better and then everyone looks at this time of my life and thinks oh see he was totally fine. Im so deeply hurt by everyone around me for not caring, it makes me not want to be around them anymore. Which makes me feel so much worse

I feel like I have to do it now. So people know I was serious. I just don't want to fuck it up and live, because that's humiliating. But I want so badly to be taken seriously. If thats what it takes at this point

Oof I relate to this too. Since I've become actively suicidal, I've been trying not to imply that to anyone, so they won't feel guilty after I do it. However I became desperate and I did reach out to someone who's cut me out of their life. Begged them to speak to me because I'm suicidal and I need to take the edge off of the situation between us so I can maybe overcome. And he treated me like I'm being manipulative, gave me a suicide prevention website, and that he won't reply again.

I've gotten this impression from a couple other people who I believe he has told as well. It's like the fact that I used the word suicide has made me a toxic, manipulative person. But I'm serious, and no one is trying to help me. It makes me want to show them that I'm serious. I'm so sad and angry at the same time that I'm being abandoned.

However, impulsivity in this situation is not a good idea. And I genuinely feel like if you attempt ctb with this resentment as the core final push, that survival instinct will be strong. The decision should be about you only. Instead of trying to prove them wrong by ctb, you also have the option to overcome, become the best version of yourself over time, and live a good life without them in it. That path is also an option for us. Since you mentioned that you think it's possible for you to overcome, I sincerely hope you do. It's not fair that your friends are not there for you. I would never turn my back on someone who had suicidal thoughts. I would figure out how to show them love. Im sorry your friends have not been doing that for you. You do have the strangers on here who all want the best for you.