Venting My solutions to silly problems

[Zer0]

I have little motivation to do everything but last month my friend asked me to create a D&D character to play in his group. I tried really hard and spent the whole month creating the background and personality of the character. Yesterday was my first session with this character and due to some really bad choices he died, this just pushed me to the suicidal thoughts. I can't even see this as a good reason, i was not attached to the character, all the self hate was because I got disappointed with myself, I should be able to be better than that, I believed I was better than that but still I fucked up.

TLDR: I died in a game and hate myself because of that