Life_and_Death
Do what's best for you 🕯️ I'm............
- Jul 1, 2020
- 7,031
i need to get this out. its all inside my head and i hate it. i cant make it stop. where to start.....
you forced me to kiss you and no one believed me.
i "thought" i liked you and therefore i regret what i did. i hope youre happy ill never enjoy another bday.
you gave me attention.....and i let it go way too far. i should have listened to my butterflies ages ago.
and you.....you hid it....you made it seem ok....you made it so i wouldnt notice....but someone else did, and they told me. how could you play father and do that.
these are all different people, with more then 1 incident each (except the first one, thats just why i stopped talking about it). but it could have been so much worse and because of this i feel my mental reaction is......unworthy and over exaggerated. i almost feel kinda bad for wanting to be worthy of this pain because i know people have been there but.....i hate myself so much for it. between hating myself and the thoughts....i just cant. they have destroyed everything. i cant watch movies/tv, i cant read books, i cant stand certain people and its tearing apart my relationship......i think this is the last thing i cant handle and i dont think i ever will. the worse one was my own fault anyway.....i should just shut up
you forced me to kiss you and no one believed me.
i "thought" i liked you and therefore i regret what i did. i hope youre happy ill never enjoy another bday.
you gave me attention.....and i let it go way too far. i should have listened to my butterflies ages ago.
and you.....you hid it....you made it seem ok....you made it so i wouldnt notice....but someone else did, and they told me. how could you play father and do that.
these are all different people, with more then 1 incident each (except the first one, thats just why i stopped talking about it). but it could have been so much worse and because of this i feel my mental reaction is......unworthy and over exaggerated. i almost feel kinda bad for wanting to be worthy of this pain because i know people have been there but.....i hate myself so much for it. between hating myself and the thoughts....i just cant. they have destroyed everything. i cant watch movies/tv, i cant read books, i cant stand certain people and its tearing apart my relationship......i think this is the last thing i cant handle and i dont think i ever will. the worse one was my own fault anyway.....i should just shut up
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