Haematemesis
Student
- Jan 12, 2025
- 166
(i wrote this in my native language when i was having an anger attack and then i thought it would be cool to share it, so it's AI translation but the original is mine)
hatred, i'm not even sure if it's the right word because there's no expression to explain my feelings.
it's a complex and painful, chest-burning emotional stew.
the accumulated hatred that causes killers to stab the lifeless bodies of their victims repeatedly, even though they know they're already dead.
pure hatred echoing in my mind as i know i can never be happy in this single life, with every neuron firing and fueling it.
the intoxicating hatred that will never leave me until the final moments of my existence, slowly eroding my mind with every passing second.
this hatred, a black monster, that makes me disgusted by all the good things, a product of my individual conflicts with the past and future.
this hatred, a devil that punches the walls of my skull with every event that reminds me no one, not even myself, cares.
this hatred that drives me mad because i know i will never have what normal people acquire effortlessly.
i want to do all the disgusting things; i want to be remembered for ages by defying every religious, philosophical, and cultural norm, and to be cursed by generations to come.
i hope that god exists so he can reward me with eternal hellfire.
i want this disgusting creature to be punished as it deserves.
maybe i just want to be loved.
hatred, i'm not even sure if it's the right word because there's no expression to explain my feelings.
it's a complex and painful, chest-burning emotional stew.
the accumulated hatred that causes killers to stab the lifeless bodies of their victims repeatedly, even though they know they're already dead.
pure hatred echoing in my mind as i know i can never be happy in this single life, with every neuron firing and fueling it.
the intoxicating hatred that will never leave me until the final moments of my existence, slowly eroding my mind with every passing second.
this hatred, a black monster, that makes me disgusted by all the good things, a product of my individual conflicts with the past and future.
this hatred, a devil that punches the walls of my skull with every event that reminds me no one, not even myself, cares.
this hatred that drives me mad because i know i will never have what normal people acquire effortlessly.
i want to do all the disgusting things; i want to be remembered for ages by defying every religious, philosophical, and cultural norm, and to be cursed by generations to come.
i hope that god exists so he can reward me with eternal hellfire.
i want this disgusting creature to be punished as it deserves.
maybe i just want to be loved.
