The thoughts are back. I think my dad wishes I died instead. We were never really close and growing up devoted most of his time to attending to my brothers every need (he struggled with mental illness, addiction, behavioral issues from the time he was about 13 until his death at 28). He took care of my brother until the day he died. I've been in an abusive relationship since 2012 and my dad has witnessed most of it. Last year he(partner. father of child) infected me with herpes after serial cheating since 2012. He hasn't said anything or offered to help and has even defended and implied(I feel) that I deserve it...
Idk when I'll actually work up the guts to do it but eventually I will fall into a depressive episode and I won't come out of it. It could be ne t year it could be in 10. I don't know but I know this is how I will die if something else doesn't kill me first.
Idk when I'll actually work up the guts to do it but eventually I will fall into a depressive episode and I won't come out of it. It could be ne t year it could be in 10. I don't know but I know this is how I will die if something else doesn't kill me first.
