Is there anything that makes you re-consider ctb?

[TimeToBiteTheDust]

Or is it inevitable?

 

[mesohappy]

Little (seemingly, to some)stupid things keep me holding on each day..I waffle back and forth as many do..Yesterday I ate good,had no phonecalls or visits,and saw some coyotes w/ pups across the road in the sunset..I held on through the night..Inevitable? I dont know..That remains to be seen.

Even when Im content, CTB on my mind..Dont know what "happy" is anymore,which is maybe why I ridicule the word..Same with "love".Definitely dont want to leave my dog alone..I signed on for a responsibility with her and want to ride it out.

Wishin' you well Dust..Though sometimes there aint much wellness to wish.

 

[Squiddy]

My family and friends and fear of the unknown

 

[Ryan.s]

Or is it inevitable?

My wife. Other wise, it would be inevitable

 

[Ulisses]

do not. I did a lot of shit in the past and now it doesn't leave my head. the remorse for my actions kills me a little bit every day. i am looking forward to my ctb.

 

[Worthless_nobody]

Only my mom and my dog. I know it's inevitable eventually.

 

[Yomyom]

My death must happen, I'm just struggling on how to do it

 

[Soulless_Angel]

I often wonder if there was a yes to this for me, but no, I'm done with this shit, I am managing to act all happy on the outside, but the cracks are building, it's even worse now this virus is fucking up the UK.

 

[the box is empty]

Covid-19. I just need to make sure everyone I care about will be okay.

I'm also going to be reassigned a new psychiatrist. I figure let's see what he/she had to say first.

 

[braketimez]

Yeah, I still have days or a few days in a row right now where I feel pretty good and see myself possibly being able to handle shit. But then I remember how things are steadily getting worse in the big picture, and I don't want to deal with it all when it gets to be unbearable.

 

[Jessica5]

The thought of getting stopped before my attempt and ending up in involuntary commitment. Or even worse, failing in my attempt and becoming a vegetable.

There really is nothing else that's preventing me from an attempt.

 

[Mr2005]

The SNES. It's too good not to play again. I traded my life for those games

 

[Midnight-rain]

Inevitable eventually even if things were to get significantly better, those things being: feeling comfortable in my own body and being seen as how I want to be seen, having the confidence and passion to pursue a satisfying career, getting rid of my anger issues, and overcoming my depression disorder.

 

[KiraComplex]

laziness. stealing alcohol from cvs.

 

[JohnUK]

No it's inevitable. I am planning to ctb next month

 

[oxymoron]

Or is it inevitable?

Just when to do it maybe, procrastination? But then this has been over 2 years now and I regret not killing myself because I think that once you become suicidal, things only fall off the shelf. I can't be certain about others but my life has only progressively gotten worse.

 

[TimeToBiteTheDust]

Just when to do it maybe, procrastination? But then this has been over 2 years now and I regret not killing myself because I think that once you become suicidal, things only fall off the shelf. I can't be certain about others but my life has only progressively gotten worse.

Same for me. I quitted university for example. Doesnt make sense keep on studying if I'm going to ctb. I'm progressively losing things.

 

[BadRNG]

My parents, I study abroad and I told them, my mum said she won't cope well, and I know she won't ever forget, and I don't want her to consider suicide after I do it... looks like no matter what everything has to be about them, sigh... why did I have to be sick? I am not the type to give up at all but I exhausted all my options I can't do anything else , this is unfair!!! I just wanted to be normal that's it...not a lot to ask for, I would trade that for 3" IQ, or losing my hair...
Yeah that was a rant but tldr; my parents.

 

[CatchTheBus]

I'll have a good moment and think that "maybe I don't need to die." Or I'll see the sun rise in the morning and feel sad that I won't see it again. It makes me reconsider for a moment, but I always end up right back on track with what I have to do. My destiny is to die by my own hand. I've been trying to off myself since I was nine...I have to get it right eventually.

 

[Lastravel]

Just a matter of time but the bus is defintely closer than before

 

[tooStupidForExitBag]

Currently in the process of deciding whether I should give life a second chance or not, so not inevitable. But the more I'm thinking about realistic options the more I feel like death is the correct one, so I don't know.

 

[TimeToBiteTheDust]

Some people on Fb depressive group are calling me coward because I want to ctb. I hate this shit

 

[faust]

I think this is inevitable for me.
Well, if I were be a masochist who enjoys wageslaving, then homelessness with poor mental health, maybe there would be a point.
But I know that it will become much worse. This is not my assumption - it will really become much worse.
The only thing I can do - be not late to die. Otherwise I would have to use emergency methods.

 

[toomuchtimetodie]

Some people on Fb depressive group are calling me coward because I want to ctb. I hate this shit

Can't you take yourself out the situation. Leave the group? The last thing needed before ctb is more emotional grief.

 

[Mm80]

A tiny bit of hope. Im off antidepressants as im sick of them masking things and fucking up my brain and body. Will try to find some natural happiness. Will do what im advised, execise, eat fairly healthy, cut down alcohol. If that doesnt work im done.

 

[FohPah]

I've only rehearsed; I haven't yet attempted. So I don't know how fear would factor into the decision.

Otherwise, pretty much the only thing keeping me here is the reluctance to cause all that grief to my family. I've been thinking of ways to soften the blow and/or make the positives of my death outweigh the negatives.

 

[lanitoasmr]

I still breathing because I know if I die, my mother will be dead alive

 

[laiduponit]

The only thing that makes me ponder if I'll regret it is the idea that I'm only in a momentary bit of sadness, though it is a shame this has lasted for the better majority of my life.

 

[oxymoron]

Or is it inevitable?

You give me my health back, I would never ctb again. It is not just my health that I lost, I lost my job, visa and a shit ton of money too but I do not need them back. Trade me anything for my health and I am all in balls out.

 

[BabyYoda]

I'm giving myself until graduation to see if by that time I already have a best friend or a partner. If not, then I'll move to Japan, work there for some time, binge watch anime and play games, buy tons of anime merchandise, probably buy a virtual sex toy to cope with the pain, and if nothing else works then I'll CTB