Venting I'm so tired.

[Merocero]

I'm sorry I'm new here i've been lurking and kind of responding for a few days,, so this is my first actual post.

I'm so tired I just quit my job cause i aas supposed to start a drivers license and i told my parents (my mom was being shitty about me saying that i wont be able to get both the drivers license and keep working) and now they just said they wont let me do it anymore so i'll be stuck without a job OR a drivers license, theyre not even the ones paying for it, my grandfather gave them money for my license, im 18 and still living with them, i dont go to college i started the job a month ago without thinking about the drivers license cause they pressed me about work so much, im so tired they keep comparing me to my older sister who is 22 and lives with us too, doesnt work and failed the drivers license like 10 times, i honestly dont know how much longer i can keep going, i cut myself everyday already cause of the stress from work...
imso sorry this is kind of a ramble but im just so tired and i dont know what to do...
excuse me if theres a bunch of typos im in tears rn,,

UPDATE: my mom just went into my room and shouted at me again about how im lazy and could have driving classes online (while shes fully aware im unable to learn this way, the pandemic proved ts) and that they arent paying for that which AGAIN! ITS NOT YOUR MONEY! AND NOT YOUR DECISION TO MAKE! I'm so fucking tired its after 10 pm and i still need to shower and i get up early tomorrow for the job sigh... i just wish i had somewhere to move, i hate living with my mom,,

 

[yawdrareg]

i can't do or say anything to take all the stress away from you right now, but just know that i hear you and that you're not alone. i hope things get at least a little better for you soon. much love

 

[getoutgirl]

I'm sorry the stress is eating you away like that :(
It can get real bad. Specially if you aren't getting much support from the people close to you.

I'd hope you could convince them (maybe not now, or in a couple of days once they feel a bit different about it) and that you could start getting the license. Then getting back to work afterwards. Maybe talk some sense into them.
But if you are also too tired or stressed out at the moment to do that I also get it. Take it as easy as you can rn. Sorry you have to resort to self harm, this site has some good resources about it if you haven't checked them out, do so if u want, I've found some quite helpful for myself some days when I struggle to not self harm.

but yeah, like I said I'm sorry you are going through this. In the end it's a drivers license and parents being shitty, but the stress and pain and feelings are very real regardless. So I hope they get easier for you to manage, and that these shitty days go away. I'm sure they will- Hugs <3

 

[Merocero]

I'm sorry the stress is eating you away like that :(
It can get real bad. Specially if you aren't getting much support from the people close to you.

I'd hope you could convince them (maybe not now, or in a couple of days once they feel a bit different about it) and that you could start getting the license. Then getting back to work afterwards. Maybe talk some sense into them.
But if you are also too tired or stressed out at the moment to do that I also get it. Take it as easy as you can rn. Sorry you have to resort to self harm, this site has some good resources about it if you haven't checked them out, do so if u want, I've found some quite helpful for myself some days when I struggle to not self harm.

but yeah, like I said I'm sorry you are going through this. In the end it's a drivers license and parents being shitty, but the stress and pain and feelings are very real regardless. So I hope they get easier for you to manage, and that these shitty days go away. I'm sure they will- Hugs <3

Thank you, I'm probably going to ask them about the license again soon, the courses were supposed to start at the 18th so i dont have much time, thats also why i had to quit- i couldnt change my schedule at that point. I wish i had some supporting people irl but i dont really have friends, and the one person i do have i wouldn't want to be a burden to... I might look at the resources, thank you again sob..I wanted to admit myself into a psych ward too but we have a family trip in a week that i was excited about so i held off not to miss it, though now i dont know if they'll want to take me with them...