Venting I'm so tired of trying to get better

[pleaseiwanttogo]

I know I can still do it, can still try, I could find energy somewhere to keep fighting, but I'm so ridiculously tired of everything. I take 12 pills every day just to try to live, spend $300 dollars on my mental health, for what? i still don't want to get out of bed or even be in bed, my therapist, psychiatric, friends, family, boyfriend, they just keep seeing me fall. i swear that i tried, but im exausted. if anyone would like to talk, it would make me grateful.

 

[ipmanwc0]

me too. what happened to you?

 

[Lookingtoflyfree]

I feel this. I pay for therapy out of pocket and wonder why I bother if I plan to not be here.

I even hate having to cook - it's too much and every time I have a meal I wonder - is this the last time I'll eat this thing? I was thinking how beautiful it will be to not exist - that the pain will be done, finally