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Suicidebydeath

Suicidebydeath

No chances to be happy - dead inside
Nov 25, 2021
3,558
I feel awful when I try to help someone and fail.
I wish I either succeeded or failed with different people 100% of the time so I knew which to stick with.
I might ctb some time after the person I like ctbs, but I wish I wasn't a fuckup with other people in the mean-time.
I know its supposed to hurt. I still hate it.
Not expecting or desiring any replies really, just leaving this here to shame myself since I really want to delete it.
Anyway shoot me if you want, I'm probably someone that only made things worse for someone.
 
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Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, thequiet1, NearlyIrrelevantCake and 5 others
Sherri

Sherri

Archangel
Sep 28, 2020
13,791
Don't be so hard on yourself, you are entitled to write your threads like any of us here and what you have to say is valued, at least by me, a big hug. Feel free to reach to me anytime,
 
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nopointofliving

nopointofliving

Warrior
Apr 19, 2021
513
Hug you tight. It shall be okay <3
 
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4eyebiped

4eyebiped

Mage
Dec 28, 2019
567
Trying to help someone is profound. Most people never try. They instead judge, scorn, preach and so on. You done more than most and the outcome of our attempts is out of our control. We can offer a helping hand but it is ultimately up to the person we are trying to help to accept. This isn't something that can be forced. Not everyone can change or be saved. I do wish you the best, but I do not personally see you at fault in anyway nor a failure.

I imagine your replies on this forum alone has given many a better day.
 
cambrai33

cambrai33

Traveller
Nov 3, 2021
385
You tried to make a difference, you did what you felt was right, seriously don't be too hard on yourself and don't change who you are as a person because you come across as someone with compassion and feelings.

Please grieve as long as you need but keep being the good soul that you are
 
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Sherri

Sherri

Archangel
Sep 28, 2020
13,791
When I lost 2 friends who CTB, they sent me a text message but it was late in Europe. I felt so guilty that I couldn't have said goodbye or maybe say are you sure, I will carry this for the rest of my life.
 
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  • Aww..
Reactions: 4eyebiped and Suicidebydeath
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
44,008
I understand, it can be painful when we try and things do not work out. After all, there is no escape from ourselves and our thoughts and we cannot go back in time and change things. I wish you the best.
 
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