• ⚠️ UK Access Block Notice: Beginning July 1, 2025, this site will no longer be accessible from the United Kingdom. This is a voluntary decision made by the site's administrators. We were not forced or ordered to implement this block. If you're located in the UK, we recommend using a VPN to maintain access.

P

przeciwwymiotne

Be rude to me at all times, I don't deserve kindne
Jun 27, 2022
360
I've been through a lot. I'm disabled and depressed. I just want someone to love me unconditionally and offer to take care of me for the rest of our lives.
I want to be a kid again. I want to be innocent and amazed with the world. I want to rest.

I always wanted a kid, now I can't have kids because I'm to disabled to take care of them + I want someone to take care of me so I'm not in a well enough mental state to be a parent

I want someone to always be there, include me, never abandon me, be patient, loving, allow me to rest, be quiet, be sad, cry, be happy when I'm happy. I want a caretaker. I've had enough. My life was too hard.

I'm afraid I won't be able to finish university and even if then it'll be hard af to keep a job. I'm avoidant, lazy, I have flare-ups and inflammatory responses almost every day.
Even my psychiatrist told me it's hopeless if I don't change cuz 'Life is just hard and I'm a failure'. Honestly fuck him but he's right, I'm a failure.

I fall asleep with hopes of dying in my sleep yet I somehow still try every day. Some days are even good sometimes. But it's nowhere near 'normal functioning'.

I gotta apply for a disability but I'm procrastinating it. I wouldn't be doing anything if it weren't for my boyfriend. He helps me a lot, but he then throws tantrums and blames me and says he doesn't wanna take care of me constantly. But then he says he does idk. I'm tired
 

Attachments

  • RDT_20240603_1707332206972550274601489.png
    RDT_20240603_1707332206972550274601489.png
    1.2 MB · Views: 0
  • Like
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
Reactions: FERAL_FRENZY, lovedread, darkenmydoorstep and 4 others