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boywhowasneverloved

boywhowasneverloved

Member
Sep 18, 2024
43
I am a 19 year old from a third-world country and I hv a few mental disorders and I am gay, So my parents know I am suicidal, so they make sure that I won't attempt, but I don't want to live, but now I hv got a small window on time where I can make a successful attempt, and I know that I want to die, but there is this strange feeling of intense pressure I don't know if it is because I am uncertain of my decision, but If I don't attempt now I might not get another chance for a couple of years.

what should I do.(I hv to make up my mind in few hours or I'll loose my opportunity)
 
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L'absent

L'absent

Banned
Aug 18, 2024
1,391
It's difficult to give you an answer. Only you know how long you can resist.
 
redkitsune98

redkitsune98

Broken beyond repair
Sep 2, 2024
181
I understand your feeling. The very image you use as a profile picture served as inspiration for an artpiece my ex boyfriend made back when we were together ans seeing it made me feel like dying again.
Do you have access to any methods? Do you have anything you think you could use?
I am here available to talk to you
 
boywhowasneverloved

boywhowasneverloved

Member
Sep 18, 2024
43
I understand your feeling. The very image you use as a profile picture served as inspiration for an artpiece my ex boyfriend made back when we were together ans seeing it made me feel like dying again.
Do you have access to any methods? Do you have anything you think you could use?
I am here available to talk to you
yeah, so my plan is to run away when my parents will be visiting to see my therapist, and buy a rope and go to a forest and do it there.
 
redkitsune98

redkitsune98

Broken beyond repair
Sep 2, 2024
181
If you think that is something you can do, you should try looking on how to tie the knot and where to hang it from, also how to lose consciousness fast when hanging. Try searching for full suspension hanging threads and there will be a lot of info
 
boywhowasneverloved

boywhowasneverloved

Member
Sep 18, 2024
43
If you think that is something you can do, you should try looking on how to tie the knot and where to hang it from, also how to lose consciousness fast when hanging. Try searching for full suspension hanging threads and there will be a lot of info
I hv done my research and I am fully prepared for it, but I am unsure If this is the right thing for me.
 
redkitsune98

redkitsune98

Broken beyond repair
Sep 2, 2024
181
If you are not sure, try evaluating your life and understanding how things could get better or worse and how likely it is.
Me, for example, nothing can get better. I saw your profile picture and was flashbombed by memories of him drawing his artpiece inspired by that one and how he said i was the only boy who ever cared about his art. He ain't coming back so i ain't staying.
Certainty is a feeling, so check if you're feeling it
 
Mebius

Mebius

Student
Jun 13, 2024
183
Youre not going to do it, just skip for now and plan later. Yes life sucks ass, but if you're going to leave, might ass well make it as smooth as possible and not on impulse.
 
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
44,944
I wish you the best in what you decide.
 
ForgottenAgain

ForgottenAgain

On the rollercoaster of sadness
Oct 17, 2023
1,141
If you're unsure, you shouldn't do it. Also, ctb under time pressure can lead to a ton of mistakes and you don't want to make your life worse by failing an attempt and surviving with lasting damage.
 
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DeadNotSleeping

DeadNotSleeping

Another lamb that chose the slaughter
Oct 7, 2024
148
Just to reiterate what others have said the chance for a fuck up is way too great in this instance. It's great you have done the research but that doesn't prepare you fully for when the time actually comes. And only having a small window to do it will ultimately result in making mistakes.

I know you're not hearing what you want from this thread, and I'm sure nobody here means any disrespect. The issue with hanging when it goes wrong is it can really make your life worse. It has to be done right.
 
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Reactions: Defenestration
Defenestration

Defenestration

I want to have the courage to defenestrate myself
Oct 25, 2020
1,508
I am a 19 year old from a third-world country and I hv a few mental disorders and I am gay, So my parents know I am suicidal, so they make sure that I won't attempt, but I don't want to live, but now I hv got a small window on time where I can make a successful attempt, and I know that I want to die, but there is this strange feeling of intense pressure I don't know if it is because I am uncertain of my decision, but If I don't attempt now I might not get another chance for a couple of years.

what should I do.(I hv to make up my mind in few hours or I'll loose my opportunity)
If you dont know, stop, dont it
 

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