• Hey Guest,

    We wanted to share a quick update with the community.

    Our public expense ledger is now live, allowing anyone to see how donations are used to support the ongoing operation of the site.

    👉 View the ledger here

    Over the past year, increased regulatory pressure in multiple regions like UK OFCOM and Australia's eSafety has led to higher operational costs, including infrastructure, security, and the need to work with more specialized service providers to keep the site online and stable.

    If you value the community and would like to help support its continued operation, donations are greatly appreciated. If you wish to donate via Bank Transfer or other options, please open a ticket.

    Donate via cryptocurrency:

    Bitcoin (BTC):
    Ethereum (ETH):
    Monero (XMR):
I

ilk

Member
Jun 1, 2024
21
i cant even cry right now. i so badly want to hang myself already. i been staying up for days just thinking & working on my letter to my family. im losing myself more & more each day. depression you win. or whatever you is. some days it feels deeper than just being depressed & suicidal. like im losing my mind, like i dont belong here idk. i dont even know the point of this post. i just dont get it. i never will. what is wrong with me? why cant i be ok? i cant keep living this way. i cant change. i wont ever heal. why stay? just to suffer more? just to continue push my family away ? it pains me to but theres nothing they can do for me.
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: mewomewo, Lost Impact, deadngoresurgery and 12 others
fkyou

fkyou

...
Oct 1, 2022
466
Same it's painful I have to spare myself from the nonsense
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: darksouls, itsgone2 and ilk
N

niki wonoto

Experienced
Oct 10, 2019
232
same here

- from Indonesia -
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: darksouls, itsgone2 and ilk
unluckysadness

unluckysadness

Enlightened
Jul 9, 2025
1,058
Same. SI is so powerful. It doesn't make sense when life is over.
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
  • Like
Reactions: TimetoGo!, darksouls, Kazu Ha and 3 others
C

Carryline

Student
Oct 11, 2025
183
I hate myself even more
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: tomatriste, darksouls, itsgone2 and 1 other person
cemeteryismyhome

cemeteryismyhome

Paragon
Mar 15, 2025
972
I feel trapped in a body that won't die, like some kind of nightmare zombie hell. I really do think people such as yourself are clearly seeing reality.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: TimetoGo!, darksouls, Carryline and 4 others
A_Spartan_Dead

A_Spartan_Dead

Life's sick joke is us; death is the punchline.
Dec 17, 2025
114
Life is ironic
SI stops us from freeing ourself of the suffering and disgusting circumstances like homelessness, SA, starvation, etc
Then it ages us until we die and SI is useless and we rot
 
  • Love
  • Hugs
  • Like
Reactions: catsalvation, ilk, tomatriste and 3 others
I

itsgone2

-
Sep 21, 2025
1,212
It just sucks. Why can't we get out of this mess? None of us asked for it.
I didn't ask to be born so dumb, to just always make the wrong decision. Angry. Distant. Narcissistic. I want out. It's absolutely NEVER going to get better so what is the point??????
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
  • Like
Reactions: ilk, tomatriste, A_Spartan_Dead and 3 others
Kazu Ha

Kazu Ha

Weird, lonely German Guy
Jul 26, 2025
71
Same. I just feel empty, but SI keeps me from ending my suffering.
Nothing has changed over the years. Why should anything suddenly change now? I've tried therapy, but that didn't help either and just made me feel worthless.
 
  • Love
  • Hugs
  • Like
Reactions: ilk, A_Spartan_Dead, FreeHer77 and 2 others
deadngoresurgery

deadngoresurgery

Jezebel
Jan 10, 2026
39
i cant even cry right now. i so badly want to hang myself already. i been staying up for days just thinking & working on my letter to my family. im losing myself more & more each day. depression you win. or whatever you is. some days it feels deeper than just being depressed & suicidal. like im losing my mind, like i dont belong here idk. i dont even know the point of this post. i just dont get it. i never will. what is wrong with me? why cant i be ok? i cant keep living this way. i cant change. i wont ever heal. why stay? just to suffer more? just to continue push my family away ? it pains me to but theres nothing they can do for me.
I hate my life so much. it was going alright, but now its just gone to shit. i know how you feel. i want to just lay down and never wake up again. but i also want a pretty suicide, as in, i want my brains to be scattered everywhere, my guts hanging out, scratches, cuts and bruises everywhere, an eye hanging out, all of that. i just am so obsessed with that.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: ilk
I

its_so_over

Member
Oct 27, 2024
14
i cant even cry right now. i so badly want to hang myself already. i been staying up for days just thinking & working on my letter to my family. im losing myself more & more each day. depression you win. or whatever you is. some days it feels deeper than just being depressed & suicidal. like im losing my mind, like i dont belong here idk. i dont even know the point of this post. i just dont get it. i never will. what is wrong with me? why cant i be ok? i cant keep living this way. i cant change. i wont ever heal. why stay? just to suffer more? just to continue push my family away ? it pains me to but theres nothing they can do for me.
I agree man i gotta get outta here
 
  • Love
Reactions: ilk
catsalvation

catsalvation

Member
Sep 13, 2025
81
I feel the same way. I wish there was a button I could push to disappear immediately.
 
  • Love
Reactions: deadngoresurgery and ilk
gasforme

gasforme

Student
Jan 9, 2026
106
I know it's not possible but SI is so selfish it doesn't understand that we live in a society and your life can be worth taking if you don't fit into that society.
 
  • Love
Reactions: ilk

Similar threads

dsbmloverluna
Replies
1
Views
119
Suicide Discussion
Praestat_Mori
P
trashisland
Replies
10
Views
463
Suicide Discussion
loggingin
loggingin
HowlingCoyote
Replies
2
Views
123
Suicide Discussion
SufferingDev
SufferingDev
rabidbunny
Replies
1
Views
132
Suicide Discussion
Dreamwalker
Dreamwalker