Venting I genuinely cant stand them anymore.

[SenelXamano]

This feels like a fucking nightmare. I genuinely can't fucking stand them. I can't stand their constant matching profile pictures their fucking bios their subtle flirting. I feel like she's trying to take him away from me. I genuinely feel miserable all fucking day if I don't talk to him. And I'm starting to feel like shit if she joins while we're talking. I fucking hate being here. I hate feeling like this. I've relapsed twice over this and for once have everything i need to Leave. They're not going to break up any time soon and even if they did what would that change? If they did for me then I'd just be ruining everything for everyone and they'd hate me. This feels like some sick fucking joke. My two best friends. What a fucking joke this is. And her, of anyone. That's what fucking hurts the most. He means everything to me even if we stayed just friends forever. It still fucking hurts knowing my best friend is with him. It's fucking destroying me. I honestly can't think of her without feeling mad. Jealous. And I just keep digging deeper into everything. Their reposts their bios their profiles their posts every single one of their msgs. Their nicknames on discord. "Bae bae" just tell me to kill myself already tell me you hate me tell me something so I can finally leave. All I'm alive for is him but I'm fucking losing him. Only reason I'm excited to get up in the morning only reason I try. I wish something horrible would happen to me so I can finally die or at least have someone fucking care about me. Have him care about me. I don't think it's worth trying to stay alive anymore.