nogoodfatautist
Dreaming of another universe
- Oct 31, 2023
- 10
Well here I am again after about 2 years of not being on here... they say it gets better and yes things have gotten better in a way? Found out I have PCOS and I lost 45 pounds but unfortunately put like 10~ish back on (have no idea the exact number i refuse to get on the scale). But now Im dependent on a handful of pills and supplements just to maintain it... a pillbox at 24 full enough to rival an 80 yr olds. And im still considered obese and have a long way to go. yippee. Got a job thats 90% by myself but the 10% socializing is so unbearable I almost quit so many times and also drove me to finally buy the rope. I actually ordered it while I was on the clock
Anyways Im still not sure if I will be using it because my stupid monkey brain is hanging on to the sliver of a chance things will get better. Also the chance of failing and or being sent to hell after death freaks me out. Im just glad I have it now in case. Only thing getting me through the days is Runescape and weed and honestly wouldve ctb long time ago if i didnt start smoking weed. Anyways just shouting into the void lol