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DevonBostick'sAss

DevonBostick'sAss

BillyIdol
Jan 10, 2025
97
Before i had my first sex i was so excited and nervous about it and how it feels. Afterwards I said to myself " Thats it? This was what all people excited about? Is this lust? " Etc. I did not enjoy any part of it. I did not feel pain too. Nothing. It was nothing.

I am okay If one day some partner of mine would wanna have sex. But I dont enjoy it. Male genitalia is disgusting to me. Its inhumane. For those who are wondering If i had any Trauma sexually: no I did not.

I enjoy kissing and making out. I enjoy when someone touches me but I do not want to touch them so I feel bad when they only do to me and I repay them by giving sex.

When an old partner of mine asked "Can you touch mine" I immediately wanted to vomit and run away from them. Although I had sex lots of time I have never LOOKED to a male genitalia. I've never seen it irl. It is disgusting. It makes me want to puke.

I also want sex time to be over as quickly as possible. I dont like it. I dont enjoy the feeling. When they ask "Do u like it" In that moaning ahh tone it makes me laugh so much it makes me so cringe. I cant take them seriously or see them as i saw them before.

I dont know if Im asexual cause even though it's rarely i want to make out with people or do all things other than sex. What is this called? What am I? I also masturbate. I love it. I feel relaxed and okay with myself. I dont want to interact with anyone to have sex. I never lust over anyone but my precious Devon Bostick (joke). I never lust over anyone.

When i brought this up to my latest partner they did not like it and said IDK how long we can do this and stuff. He wanted sex all time. I dont want to. I cant. I hate it. It makes me hate myself and the one who i am with. It makes me want to puke and leave them.
 
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LURKMOAR

LURKMOAR

Member
Nov 22, 2024
29
Asexuality just indicates an aversion to sex, and nothing more. If you still have relationships, and, say, have romantic attraction to women/femininity, then you are asexual gyneromantic; if you are romantically attracted to men/masculinity, asexual androromantic.
 
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DevonBostick'sAss

DevonBostick'sAss

BillyIdol
Jan 10, 2025
97
Asexuality just indicates an aversion to sex. If you still have relationships, and, say, have romantic attraction to women/femininity, you are gyneromantic; if you are romantically attracted to men/masculinity, you are androromantic.
I am okay to have relationships. I usually am not attracted to a persons look, body etc. I do not feel lust over them. But i can still be attracted to their personality.
 
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ma0

ma0

How did I get here?
Dec 20, 2024
624
Do you watch porn, by chance? I read online that regularly watching porn makes you less sexually satisfied, that might be part of it.
 
DevonBostick'sAss

DevonBostick'sAss

BillyIdol
Jan 10, 2025
97
Do you watch porn, by chance? I read online that regularly watching porn makes you less sexually satisfied, that might be part of it.
I do but not often. I dont masturbate that much to porn too.
 
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particularrodent

Member
Jan 4, 2025
80
Asexuality just indicates an aversion to sex, and nothing more. If you still have relationships, and, say, have romantic attraction to women/femininity, then you are asexual gyneromantic; if you are romantically attracted to men/masculinity, asexual androromantic.
this is not true (i say this in a genuine tone)
asexuality means you're not sexually attracted to people/don't feel sexual attraction. it says nothing about being averse to sex; it's a spectrum. many asexuals have sex and enjoy it, and many asexuals are truly averse to sex and never engage. both are asexual. what the label hinges on is a lack of feeling sexual attraction

use of the split model (xsexual and xromantic) and terms like gyno/androromantic is also up to each individual person's preferences (these specific terms aren't super common anyway, more people label themselves with the hetero/homo/biromantic labels)
 
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tryingtoquietdown

tryingtoquietdown

it's too loud in my head
Mar 6, 2024
33
It sounds to me like you're either not attracted to penises or just don't enjoy penetrative sex. You could label that as asexuality, homosexuality, or just your personal preference regarding sex. It's actual label depends on what you feel fits most comfortably. A lot of the disinterest in sex with a partner is probably coming from the pressure you feel wanting to make your partner happy, pressuring yourself to feel pleasure when you don't, and overall societal pressure regarding sex. It's super common for the pressure and expectation to have sex to absolutely kill any real libido you might have.

If you're looking for suggestions, I would say to just be really open about what you're looking for with sex. There's a surprising amount of people that want to only focus on your pleasure and don't enjoy being touched during sex. That's just one of the worries you listed, but seriously, there's a preference for everything out there. You're not in the wrong for not liking sex a certain way; you just need to find a partner who likes it the same way you do.
 
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