How do you deal with disappointment?

[cookiencream]

Even tho I've been doing relatively "better" there's always those times where reality kind of hits me and the roses all die or however the expression goes. It hits me that my problems with life aren't gone, they're still there, they still affect me. I'm just...ignoring them. And then I realize that getting better doesn't mean life will change, just that I'll become complacent until I die. Idk I think I'm just down rn who knows. But I can only find life worth living when I don't think about it's problems, but I always think about them eventually. There's nothing I can do, I'm powerless so why am I trying to struggle against the world. I should just ignore everything and distract myself until I die. I mean it can happen at any moment, which brings me a slight feeling of euphoria.

 

[woofwag]

I relate so hard to this. I always feel like I'm disappointing myself, like I've become complacent with my misery and can't seem to fix it. But you're not ignoring it. Ignoring it would look like you never even acknowledging it at all. It's just that life offers a lot of distractions, and it can be a survival mechanism to avoid our real problems. It's a big part of why I find death so appealing. It can make the sad reality all go away forever.

Besides me lamenting about experiencing the same thing, I'd say that generally I either A. ignore it or B. accept that I'm disabled/mentally ill and I'm working the best with what I've got. It's generally not a great motivator for me to actually do things. I just get sad and miserable. Very occasionally I attempt to talk to disappointed parts and acknowledge their role in my system, giving them credence for doing their job but reminding them that shame is not a good motivator, and that I'm really trying my best to work shit out. I rarely do that anymore. It's become too exhausting. But it is worth a shot. I have found IFS therapy helpful (basically the thing I'm describing with working with parts).

Idk if any of that is helpful to hear. I hope things can get better for you and that you can find some ways to handle the disappointment, even if it's just a little bit.

 

[cookiencream]

I relate so hard to this. I always feel like I'm disappointing myself, like I've become complacent with my misery and can't seem to fix it. But you're not ignoring it. Ignoring it would look like you never even acknowledging it at all. It's just that life offers a lot of distractions, and it can be a survival mechanism to avoid our real problems. It's a big part of why I find death so appealing. It can make the sad reality all go away forever.

Besides me lamenting about experiencing the same thing, I'd say that generally I either A. ignore it or B. accept that I'm disabled/mentally ill and I'm working the best with what I've got. It's generally not a great motivator for me to actually do things. I just get sad and miserable. Very occasionally I attempt to talk to disappointed parts and acknowledge their role in my system, giving them credence for doing their job but reminding them that shame is not a good motivator, and that I'm really trying my best to work shit out. I rarely do that anymore. It's become too exhausting. But it is worth a shot. I have found IFS therapy helpful (basically the thing I'm describing with working with parts).

Idk if any of that is helpful to hear. I hope things can get better for you and that you can find some ways to handle the disappointment, even if it's just a little bit.

I think part of my disappointment is that I don't want to be alive, yet, I can't bring myself to end it. And ofc I don't want to have a miserable life, but life will always be miserable when you don't want it. So idk, I'm just tired. I'm gonna daydream about how much better life could be, that's what kept me sane when I was little