How do I make it through these next few weeks?

[existenceissuffering]

So many things have been going wrong, but I have to wait until late January. One of my siblings will be going to college in late January. Although I will be ctb with SN in a hotel, said sibling generally figures things out and might go in my room and find the suicide note. But my parents wouldn't go in my room. Not only that, but I'm trying to take care of everything first so my parents don't have to. It's hard. I really just want to ctb now. Does anyone have any tips on just getting through these next few weeks? It's going to be hard to. It's so hard to organize everything and it's so tempting to just take the SN tonight and go to bed.