Got my SN taken away by the police

[nitrogenous]

I fucking hate my life. Got confidentiality broken on me again but instead of the ambulance, the police came and they took my SN away. It was very unexpected as I didn't know anyone was coming to my house and didn't have any indications that I would have confidentiality broken. At first, they wouldn't even fucking tell me who called them. When the police arrive, they bribed me that if I give the SN to them they'd send me to another hospital other than the one that I've always been to previously as that hospital is useless as fuck, if any they always make me more suicidal afterwards. It's filled with people who have no compassion or empathy at all. I really regret giving the SN to the police, I'm such an idiot. I wasn't sure if they have rights to take it out of me if I didn't comply and I know I probably had no chance of running away as they were packed with tasers etc on them. I got discharged roughly 6 hours after getting to this other hospital and it was definitely better than the usual hospital, but still got told "you can kill yourself tomorrow if you want to, it's your life" "you're so young, you don't know anything" "we can't help with anything but you can get through this". Really considering reordering the sodium nitrite at this point cause I really don't have anything to lose ugh. I don't know if that's wise of me to order it now though, or if I should wait for another mental health episode/when I'm in desperation. Wish I had taken the SN before they came fuck this. My medical team will fucking blame me for this because they really hate me getting care outside of them and even told me to fake my suicidality to everyone else.

 

[rkk3]

are you in usa where was this

 

[blush]

wow, that sounds unbelievable. "you can kys tmr if you want to"? i'm so sorry you experienced this

 

[Liebestod]

I know how you feel, I got my gun taken away from me by the police.

 

[Alek1=]

wow, that sounds unbelievable. "you can kys tmr if you want to"? i'm so sorry you experienced this

They are at least honest, it;s your life and it;s your choice afterall. Wonder if there's a context to it or they just straight up say shit like this to suicidal people.

 

[nitrogenous]

are you in usa where was this

Australia

wow, that sounds unbelievable. "you can kys tmr if you want to"? i'm so sorry you experienced this

Lowkey that made me wanna kms even more, but I couldn't cuz my SN isn't here anymore, I felt like I should have fought the police to not give it to them. I feel like I could probably talk my way out of it somehow if I wasn't so stressed with the sudden police encounter

I know how you feel, I got my gun taken away from me by the police.

I'm sorry you had a similar situation. It's so devastating, like I understand they have a duty of care and what not but on the other hand, there's no solution to "fixing" our problems or suicidality. So taking the means away in my opinion just makes things worse.

They are at least honest, it;s your life and it;s your choice afterall. Wonder if there's a context to it or they just straight up say shit like this to suicidal people.

Well, yeah. My medical team (GP, psychiatrist) always say the same thing. If I talk about my situation (practical problems) and how I feel hopeless about it, they would just say "I don't know what to do" "I don't know how to help". Even with physical problems like issues with eating (swallowing), I got told "you just have to solve that, otherwise we are taking the meds off you (cause one of the meds can cause weight loss)". If they ask me "how are you going to solve this then? How are you going to survive?" And I reply with "I don't know, I feel so hopeless, the only way out is to die" they then would say "well it's your choice, you're an adult". I got told previously too "I can't help you if you kill yourself after this session" "If you kill yourself, I won't go to the other side just to help you". The system is so fucked up honestly..

 

[FuneralCry]

That is just so cruel and dreadful to me, I see so much cruelty in how they do all they can to force others to suffer in this torturous existence, it truly is such a horrific world where it's a crime to painlessly cease existing, I hope you find the relief you search for.

 

[Matchaaa]

They actually did that???? WTF
I'm really sorry you had to go through this. I hope you can find some peace.
They shouldn't treat someone who's already in pain like that.

 

[Natbee]

So sorry this happened to you. I am currently in hospital and they found out about my SN through customs so yeah I am not getting out of hospital atm

 

[nitrogenous]

That is just so cruel and dreadful to me, I see so much cruelty in how they do all they can to force others to suffer in this torturous existence, it truly is such a horrific world where it's a crime to painlessly cease existing, I hope you find the relief you search for.

Thank you so much. I just reordered the SN with express shipping so hopefully it will come way faster this time around and not get stuck in customs... I'm just afraid they'll flag it knowing they just seized the SN from me...

They actually did that???? WTF
I'm really sorry you had to go through this. I hope you can find some peace.
They shouldn't treat someone who's already in pain like that.

Yeah, it really sucks... Hopefully I will successfully get my SN again soon and commit before getting any unexpected interruptions...

So sorry this happened to you. I am currently in hospital and they found out about my SN through customs so yeah I am not getting out of hospital atm

Wait through customs? Oh shit... I might be screwed then... I got away with it last time, not sure about this time around...

So sorry this happened to you. I am currently in hospital and they found out about my SN through customs so yeah I am not getting out of hospital atm

If you don't mind me asking, was urs through DSL as well?

 

[truehappiness]

Thank you so much. I just reordered the SN with express shipping so hopefully it will come way faster this time around and not get stuck in customs... I'm just afraid they'll flag it knowing they just seized the SN from me...


Yeah, it really sucks... Hopefully I will successfully get my SN again soon and commit before getting any unexpected interruptions...

Wait through customs? Oh shit... I might be screwed then... I got away with it last time, not sure about this time around...

If you don't mind me asking, was urs through DSL as well?

If you ordered through DSL again could you tell me when you recieved your Tracking number?

I have ordered via Express too, 2 days ago and he told me I would recieve a tracking number on the same day
That obviously did not happen......

 

[fightclub17]

I'm so sorry you had such a horrible experience. May I know if this was from DSL?

 

[nitrogenous]

If you ordered through DSL again could you tell me when you recieved your Tracking number?

I have ordered via Express too, 2 days ago and he told me I would recieve a tracking number on the same day
That obviously did not happen......

Last time I ordered, it did took him a couple days to send me the tracking number. It got to a point where I thought I was getting scammed... I ordered again roughly 12 hours ago and hasn't received any update. He is definitely legit, either really busy with orders or the war... I did order express this time, hoping it would come much faster (normal delivery took me almost a month)

I'm so sorry you had such a horrible experience. May I know if this was from DSL?

Yeah, but with my first order, it got through customs okay. I'm just afraid that with the one I just ordered (from DSL as well) that they would already flag it given that I just had the SN seized from me. They know its disguised as something else in the packet, but it wasn't in the parcel box, so I'm just hoping it would mean that I still have a chance of having the SN delivered to me without triggering any welfare checks...

 

[fightclub17]

Yeah, but with my first order, it got through customs okay.

I think you should edit your message and remove what you wrote about how they disguise it. Don't want that getting out to customs.

How did the cops find out you had SN anyway? I'm a bit confused by this story. Did someone dob you in?

 

[No-name]

Will you get a criminal record for this? I am considering ordering soon to the Netherlands, but getting a criminal record takes the few things still positive, like future job prospects away.

 

[nitrogenous]

I think you should edit your message and remove what you wrote about how they disguise it. Don't want that getting out to customs.

How did the cops find out you had SN anyway? I'm a bit confused by this story. Did someone dob you in?

Well it was really an unexpected visit from the police… The MH system has known for a long time that I do have it, but they never really cared. Even if I get sent to the ER, they would do nothing about my suicidality. I suppose it's because the cops were sent that I got it taken away more easily. It's my first encounter with the cops vs the usual paramedics as I'm always classified as low risk of harming others

Will you get a criminal record for this? I am considering ordering soon to the Netherlands, but getting a criminal record takes the few things still positive, like future job prospects away.

They told me "I'm not in trouble"… I don't know how much I trust them. I'm definitely somewhere in their system, but as far as I'm aware in Australia at least suicide/suicide attempt is no longer a criminal offence. I guess the only thing is whether possessing SN could be classified as an offence, but I feel like if it's with the intention to end your own life it should again fall under the non-criminal act of attempting suicide…

 

[fightclub17]

Will you get a criminal record for this? I am considering ordering soon to the Netherlands, but getting a criminal record takes the few things still positive, like future job prospects away.

SN isn't illegal to possess. It's just a restricted substance. They shouldn't get a criminal record for that.

Well it was really an unexpected visit from the police… The MH system has known for a long time that I do have it, but they never really cared. Even if I get sent to the ER, they would do nothing about my suicidality. I suppose it's because the cops were sent that I got it taken away more easily. It's my first encounter with the cops vs the usual paramedics as I'm always classified as low risk of harming others

How frustrating that the MH team seemed to not care, and then later the cops show up.

 

[nitrogenous]

SN isn't illegal to possess. It's just a restricted substance. They shouldn't get a criminal record for that.

How frustrating that the MH team seemed to not care, and then later the cops show up.

It truly does suck, I'm actually ruminating a lot thinking how maybe I should have fought harder when they tried taking the SN to see whether they do have legal rights to take it or whether I had the choice to not have it taken away. I'm just highly concerned about the odds of my new SN order getting flagged in the customs because of this though…

If it somehow gets through I'm sure I will have the upper hand of them thinking I don't have any means anymore and being able to succeed once the right time comes…

 

[No-name]

Google warns me in the Netherlands I will lose my job and get a record. Jobs like being a nurse/ doctor working with mental patients etc can make me suspect of trying to sell or spread SN. The last few years these rules became more strict because of the news surrounding SN and people trying to spread it.
So even if only personal use (500mg doesn't look personal) I could get more then a warning. This since 2024, when middel x was in the news, there is a zero tolerance.

 

[daruino]

Google warns me in the Netherlands I will lose my job and get a record. Jobs like being a nurse/ doctor working with mental patients etc can make me suspect of trying to sell or spread SN. The last few years these rules became more strict because of the news surrounding SN and people trying to spread it.
So even if only personal use (500mg doesn't look personal) I could get more then a warning. This since 2024, when middel x was in the news, there is a zero tolerance.

Pretty sure legal consequences is only if you are aiding others with their deaths by selling SN. for example: in 2024
Aiding with someone's death is -understandably- illegal. I don't think you face any legal consequences if it's just for personal use. Owning a lot of SN is not a reason to warrant suspicion- only if they can trace actual deaths or attempts of selling to you.

There is the possibility of getting a welfare check. A friend of mine ordered SN off a polish site. It was a lot- I think 1-3kg of it. He didn't receive any welfare checks though- but this was 2 years ago. On sasu I couldn't find any stories either:

Has anyone from the Netherlands recently gotten a welfare check after purchasing SN? I have a source but I'm too scared to order it for this reason as I do not live alone.

Not to my knowledge, that is not a standard procedure over here.

 

[DungEater]

Really looks like its just chance if SN gets seized or not rn

 

[nitrogenous]

Google warns me in the Netherlands I will lose my job and get a record. Jobs like being a nurse/ doctor working with mental patients etc can make me suspect of trying to sell or spread SN. The last few years these rules became more strict because of the news surrounding SN and people trying to spread it.
So even if only personal use (500mg doesn't look personal) I could get more then a warning. This since 2024, when middel x was in the news, there is a zero tolerance.

I think that's why I personally order the smallest amount possible (50g) to have a better chance to avoid suspicions. I had a quick look on google (obviously don't rely on me for this) but it did not state that attempted suicide or anything in nature of that to be a criminal offence. Unapproved assisted suicide is obviously an offence to anyone though. I understand with those kind of healthcare jobs how it can be a big hinder, as I'm trying to be one myself, but I wonder if this actually happened whether there's law protecting this as discrimination…

Really looks like its just chance if SN gets seized or not rn

I think so too. I already have the parcel from DSL automatically put into my local shipment app without issues, so hopefully this is a good first sign. I do know if it's the first time ordering from DSL there really shouldn't be any problem at all, but I'm just a bit more paranoid given my circumstances. Maybe I should start thinking of excuses if it does get seized… not sure what can convince them though