Venting Feels like I’ve already died

[BlueButterfly111]

It feels like I've already died. I used to be pure and innocent, and my soul used to be full of light and joy. It feels like ever since my boyfriend passed away almost 2 years ago, that I just died, like I'm empty on the inside. Don't get me wrong, I was depressed before then, but something inside me changed and it never came back. It's like the light inside me is gone. Everything I do now feels meaningless, it's a really weird empty and hollow feeling, feels like I already died. I don't feel joy the way that I used to, I wonder if I'll ever get that light back again, I wonder if I'll ever feel happy the way I used to feel before he passed away again. Feels like I'm living in a parallel dystopian lifetime, which I basically am, but it shouldn't be this way.

 

[timf]

The movie Harold and Maude might be something to watch. Harold falls in love with Maude but she dies. Before she goes she tells Harold who is lamenting her death to "go and love some more".

Cat Stevens does the sound track. It is a dark comedy about a boy who is focused on death.

 

[FadingSnowFake]

I can relate to feeling dead and empty inside. Sending love and hugs.

 

[GremlinCan56]

It feels like I've already died. I used to be pure and innocent, and my soul used to be full of light and joy. It feels like ever since my boyfriend passed away almost 2 years ago, that I just died, like I'm empty on the inside. Don't get me wrong, I was depressed before then, but something inside me changed and it never came back. It's like the light inside me is gone. Everything I do now feels meaningless, it's a really weird empty and hollow feeling, feels like I already died. I don't feel joy the way that I used to, I wonder if I'll ever get that light back again, I wonder if I'll ever feel happy the way I used to feel before he passed away again. Feels like I'm living in a parallel dystopian lifetime, which I basically am, but it shouldn't be this way.

I can relate to feeling like living in a parallel dystopian lifetime and it feeling like it definitely shouldn't be the way it is.