does anyone else daydream about the way they'd like to die?

[derpsie]

today all I could muster up the energy to do was imagining myself in a hotel room with sn maybe benzos, wired earbuds for playing this one song on loop that makes me cry, a christian orthodox prayer book to recite prayers from as im dying, the clothes id like to be wearing like Italian designer, margiela sneakers, the position id like to die in, maybe slumped over but still sitting in a chair holding a bible by my chest because it would look dope. also id like to bring some cigarettes and smoke inside as im reciting these prayers. idk.

 

[nool]

I do. I'm going to be using the night-night method and I keep imagining the feeling, wondering if I'll even manage. I feel optimistic and a sense of impending relief.

 

[Worndown]

Smoking in a hotel? Risky!!