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hiitsme

Member
Aug 13, 2024
27
i just ordered the things i need to ctb but she's having birth in a month. i feel obviously horrible, but the last time i waited until her wedding and nothing changed just started doing benzos lol. idk we're not super close, but i am close with my nephew, but idk if they want me to be around them a lot anyways bc im trans. idk just feels really evil but i need to do it
 
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Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
12,209
It's more a very difficult decision than being outright evil I feel. Obviously, most of us want to do what we can not to hurt our loved ones but then, we're hurting too. It's a horrible situation where no one really wins and, someone hurts- one way or another.

Sometimes my whole anti-natilist viewpoint makes me think it's evil to put people in these circumstances to begin with. Or, at least waltz straight into the risk of these dilemas becoming a reality. But then, 'evil' also feels too extreme when I doubt our parents did it with bad intentions.

So no, not really 'evil'. More very tragic and difficult.
 
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outrider567

Visionary
Apr 5, 2022
2,863
i just ordered the things i need to ctb but she's having birth in a month. i feel obviously horrible, but the last time i waited until her wedding and nothing changed just started doing benzos lol. idk we're not super close, but i am close with my nephew, but idk if they want me to be around them a lot anyways bc im trans. idk just feels really evil but i need to do it
I would wait til after she gives birth
 
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alwaysalone

Experienced
May 14, 2025
209
No it's not evil. It's not like you're killing her you're killing yourself.
 
Dot

Dot

Info abt typng styl on prfle.
Sep 26, 2021
3,351
Slf undrstnd tht hangng on mght b dffclt bt slf knw sme1 irl whse brothr ctb whle thy wre pregnnt - th/ mothr suffrd pst-partm psychoss & ws hearng hs voic tellng hr 2 join hm

Evry1 = dffrnt bt if u r cnsidrng ur sistr welfre thn trma + all of thse hormonl chnges cld b damgng fr hr - ofc ctb cn alwys b damgng bt thnk atm = cld b rskier
 
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RandomFellowIdc

Member
Jan 30, 2025
26
It's a fucked up situation. Often is when it comes to CTB.
But "evil" implies some malicious intent, which is not the case here
 
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hiitsme

Member
Aug 13, 2024
27
bump, it's also bc if i don't do it soon then i have to move into a new apartment and try to figure out jobs through doordash/onlyfans. and then ive also been taking a lot of benzos. ugh it sucks so bad, but i feel like i need to do it
 
bankai

bankai

Enlightened
Mar 16, 2025
1,826
No, it's not evil. You're suffering, obviously. I'm sure it feels wrong, but that's understandable. Suicide always feels wrong. To be honest, I think. I think there will be something blocking our path at all times.sister's marriage, Sister's child, anniversaries,weddings,birthdays so on.If you really want,then you can go ahead.
 

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