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fatty44

fatty44

Member
Aug 2, 2023
44
> my mother got paranoid schizoprenia when i was 12
> father emotionally cold and almost never there, all he ever cared about was money
> me and my siblings had to take care of my mother, it was emotionally devastating
> our father pressured us to not tell anyone or get help
> i didn't know of her exact diagnosis till this year, always had the feeling it is our fault
> super chaotic household
> could never invite anyone
> lived on a farm in total isolation
> siblings bullied me
> gained a lot of weight when i turned 12 as a coping mechanism
> former friends became bullies
> almost all my siblings have serious mental health issues and are at risk of suicide, just like my mother

there is so much misunderstanding from people to my situation that i start to think i wasn't dealt a bad hand, i am just too weak to deal with it.
already wrote my will because in both ways, i'm really fucked up lol
 
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Suicidebydeath

Suicidebydeath

No chances to be happy - dead inside
Nov 25, 2021
3,558
Very relatable. I'm sorry for your suffering.
 
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M

Meteora

Ignorance is bliss
Jun 27, 2023
2,001
I can understand that very well. It is true unfortunately that people don't give a damn. I ve been struggeling my whole life for my mental health problems to be taken seriously. I m not yet seen as someone who deserves support.

The bottom line is that ppl will not understand until we re hanging from the ceiling maybe not even then.
 
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H

Hunter2005

Experienced
Apr 15, 2023
230
No you don't have weak character, the universe just shitted on us that's why
 
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Guy Smiley

Guy Smiley

Just another lost soul
Jan 4, 2024
456
You're not weak at all. The people who don't understand you very likely haven't had to go through even half of what you have.
 
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tbroken

tbroken

Wizard
Feb 22, 2024
690
The point is to have a clear mind, if you have all these things in your head, you will never have time to build your skills and character. If the situation becomes a nightmare, find a job elsewhere and change your life.
 
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vak

vak

In recovery 🤞
Feb 13, 2024
245
You were dealt a terrible hand, according to your description, and I'm sorry, it's not fair 🫂 Nobody should struggle that much at such young age and I think any reasonable person recognizes how difficult this must have been for you and how it affects you even now 😢 Anyone doubting you doesn't know what they are talking about and it pains me that it makes you doubt yourself..

We all have a certain breaking point, regardless of how others label it. For some, resilience builds up with age; for others, it only gets worse. I would say most people develop a tough skin throughout their lives, but that doesn't mean life stops painful or anything. Coping mechanisms develop alongside the pain, and these two race each other until the end.
 
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darkSea

darkSea

Member
Mar 7, 2024
44
You might be weak and you might be strong. Anybody would have a very tough time with those circumstances, so it's impossible to say which you are.
 
U

UKscotty

Doesn't read PMs
May 20, 2021
2,447
Definitely not weak.

How could anyone think you are weak?

I really dislike this whole 'he fought on, she's a fighter, he never gave up' kind of stuff. Depression doesn't care how strong someone is, some of the richest and fittest people get hit with it and kill themselves. From billionaires to Olympic champions.
 
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