It's just so cruel to me and horrible how they wish to force and prolong suffering no matter what even know this existence was imposed in the first place. I always suffer so much from how the option to just painlessly cease existing is so cruelly made inaccessible as I'd always prefer to not exist than suffer in this futile, torturous existence, it terrifies me how a human can exist for so long with no limit as to how much agony they can feel, I'll always see it as so dreadful to exist, I just want peace, I just hope for non-existence with no more pain, no more suffering.