Discussion Did you ever lose someone to suicide? How did it feel like? How did other people react?

[ElTopo]

I think everyone here is interested in this.
I'm really concerned about how everyone will react, family, friends, the people I know marginally. those I used to know. I even wonder if some people will get the news that I'm gone.

 

[alwaysalone]

I had an acquaintance in high school hang herself our junior year. I didn't know her very well. Everyone was understandably shocked and sad. Her parents took it pretty hard from what I heard. (small town) her moms tasted drinking heavily got divorced. My grandfather shot himself in his garage when I was 26. He had health issues but no one expected him to do that. My dad had the hardest time with it that I saw. I think that had more to do with unresolved issues than the suicide.

 

[AnEpilogue]

My mom's ex boyfriend died "of a mysteriously-circumstanced drug overdose." The papers never said the word suicide, but it didn't take a genius to figure out. He wasn't well-liked, though, because of something he did a long time ago. My mom cried about it for about an hour, then that was it. My grandma basically said that he deserved to die. The people around him more talked about it like gossip than a tragedy. Still pisses me off just thinking about it.

 

[ElTopo]

This situation is probably not applicable to yours at all, though.

I mean, it could, but thanks for assuming.
But overdoses aren't all intentional so maybe that's why the attitude?

How did you feel about it?

 

[Manic Panic]

My ex boyfriend took his life a year ago. He got incredibly drunk and hung himself in his room.

I've had many friends over the last year kill themselves. Overdoses and a gunshot to the head... I just wish one day I'd have the courage to follow after them.

Grief is the most painful thing I've ever experienced... it's pure depression... and hatred for myself.

 

[AnEpilogue]

I mean, it could, but thanks for assuming.
But overdoses aren't all intentional so maybe that's why the attitude?

How did you feel about it?

Sorry if I offended you, but I'm not going to further explain why people hated him. Its a specific, very hateable by most people's standards reason and I don't want to hear people dragging him.

He was known to be depressed for a while, and people distances themselves from him. People did anything short of spitting in his face, and I'm sure some people would've done worse. No one cared, though. And then he died. The gossip was very much about that sort of thing, that he deserved it, that he should've done it a long time ago, etc...

I felt, and still feel, upset. I wished I could've talked to him more when he was alive, but I was just a kid when they were together. I just wish he knew that one person was on his side in his life.

 

[ElTopo]

Sorry if I offended you

You didn't at all

I felt, and still feel, upset. I wished I could've talked to him more when he was alive, but I was just a kid when they were together. I just wish he knew that one person was on his side in his life.

I Hope it doesn't feel too bad talking about it. I'd be lashing out at everyone involved.

 

[im gonna grow wings]

yes, my best friend from college. shes partly why i decided to join this site. she lived in a different state, far from me after graduation. she just landed a good job, got married to her long distance partner and one day i woke up realizing we hadn't spoke in a while. found her moms social media post. she was dead the 21st of april. when i first found out i broke down, couldn't eat, couldn't sleep. felt so horrible, like i should have known and tried harder to talk to her more. she never divulged her suicidal thoughts to me, i had no idea this was even possible until she died. every day i think of her. sometimes on instagram her little profile icon shows in the bottom left on my "friends liked post" tab. i fear the day when it will stop appearing. im so angry at her for doing it, but at the same time i cant ever in my life hate her. i hope shes resting peacefully... i miss her so much, i dont think the pain will ever fully go away. i will be holding this baggage forever.

 

[swan]

my mom years ago, it felt or still feels like hell, idk how to describe it but i miss her everyday

 

[Moniker]

My half-brother killed himself when I was very young. I was too young to understand the situation and he distanced himself from the family, so I wasn't affected by it. We had met maybe two or three times.

I don't remember the initial reactions to it, but I did learn how people felt about it years later. Our father had some very interesting thoughts on it.

For context, my dad is the father of many kids. All of them have cut him off, are depressed, are absolute lunatics, or a mix of everything. With that in mind, my dad insists my brother was insane and that the genetics of his mom predisposed him to killing himself. Now, I have met his mother and I think she's garbage, but it was really baffling to me that a man who regularly abused his kids couldn't figure out why one of his many estranged children killed themself. I think the suicide affected him, but he can't accept that he played a role in it.

As for my own mom and the siblings, they really put him on a pedestal. I never knew my brother, but from what they say he was very successful, generous, kind, etc. I've heard some specific stories too, so I don't think it's just them being polite. I don't think they were close enough to be really affected by his death though.

 

[brood]

My partner with CO just over 10yrs ago. We were supposed to go together but he told me that week that "we" weren't ready. Still get angry over it, but I'll be going soon too.