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thinkingofdeath

Member
Dec 26, 2024
27
This seems like the right sub forum to post this!

I have a lot of trouble with dealing with the intense emotions that come up when other people act in a disappointing way. Rejection is the worst. I feel the pain so intensely that I sometimes get light headed and dizzy and it feels like my body is far away. After a traumatic event, the feelings can go on for days or weeks or even months. I'm a couple of months in right now from dealing with the pain of an intense disappointment and I fear more might be on the way. When it hurts this much, I can't control myself very well, and of course, I end up doing things that wreck even more of my life and make things harder than they have to be. You'd think that being self-aware and seeing some of these patterns play our would help; but no, actually changing this reaction is, or course, the hard work.

Does anyone else deal with this? What has helped you? Exercises, personal insights, research, past stories and experiences of your own, or whatever else you have to offer - I'd love to hear it. 🙏
 
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timf

Enlightened
Mar 26, 2020
1,399
Sometimes expectations can be built on hope or optimism. Those who have been disappointed often are more cautious when considering the future or when gauging if someone is trustworthy.

If you have a higher level of sensitivity than average, you may have to work at guarding it. It is a little like someone with a lot of money, you want to be able to help your friends, but you don't want anyone walking by to take whatever they want.