Breaking my heart

[goodoldnoname923]

I just can't seem to deal with it…I know we had good times and memories but i keep looking back at all the messages and it just looks horrible and it keeps fucking with my mind…

Like i know there was times were things were bad but i look back so often and i just think (was i really that bad or is something amiss) i just read back at them and something doesn't sit right…and I can't tell if its just paranoia and denial…and me just being completely unaware of how bad i was being or if something has really been messed with

I remember us having deep conversations from time to time,I remember us having laughs…I remember us connecting alot yet i look back at all these messages and dont see that anymore…and I don't know why…i really don't know why and its fucking with my head and breaking my heart

Idk what to do it just makes me more stressed feel more shitty and breaks my fucking heart…i feel i'm losing my way my mind my everything