trying ungracefully
Member
- Jun 11, 2025
- 22
I had therapy yesterday and we went to every other week because I felt like I was in a good place. But then it came crashing down when I went in and started realizing I'm not as good as I thought I was.
I can't shower or brush my teeth regularly, it's hard getting out of bed, I don't like playing the games I used to anymore even though they are my favorite things in the world. I got stuck in progress and won't leave the house anymore unless it's in the car.
I don't know if it's depression or me. I feel okay and I don't want to kill myself it's just hard to find the willpower to do anything. I still read but I have to force myself for that. I even hate going on my phone. The only thing I like is spending time with my boyfriend or family because they can really uplift my mood.
My therapist told me to talk to my psychiatrist but I don't think medication is the answer. It really does just feel like me not being able to do things as who I am. Like some people just have executive functioning issues naturally and I feel like I've been depressed for so long other than mania that I got used to not being able to do things much.
It's hard. I know what I need to do but it's just a mental block that is there keeping me in the same patterns. I went back to weekly with my therapist and she offered to go dog walking with me so I can deal with the not leaving the house portion. I went out with her before a few times and it does help it's just that I need to get over the initial block and fear
I can't shower or brush my teeth regularly, it's hard getting out of bed, I don't like playing the games I used to anymore even though they are my favorite things in the world. I got stuck in progress and won't leave the house anymore unless it's in the car.
I don't know if it's depression or me. I feel okay and I don't want to kill myself it's just hard to find the willpower to do anything. I still read but I have to force myself for that. I even hate going on my phone. The only thing I like is spending time with my boyfriend or family because they can really uplift my mood.
My therapist told me to talk to my psychiatrist but I don't think medication is the answer. It really does just feel like me not being able to do things as who I am. Like some people just have executive functioning issues naturally and I feel like I've been depressed for so long other than mania that I got used to not being able to do things much.
It's hard. I know what I need to do but it's just a mental block that is there keeping me in the same patterns. I went back to weekly with my therapist and she offered to go dog walking with me so I can deal with the not leaving the house portion. I went out with her before a few times and it does help it's just that I need to get over the initial block and fear
