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Eternal Eyes

Eternal Eyes

Student
Dec 3, 2023
129
Am I the only person who seems to go a year or so living life somewhat normally, even content to some degree, only for it to madly fall apart the following year or so? It's like I have what I call a "plague year" where everything goes wrong all at once. Am I the only person who experiences this? What are some of your worst years? Here's mine

2011 - Started middle school, and quickly realized society just wasn't made for people like me.

2012 – Saw the birth of self harm and suicide attempts. Also became very ostracised and lonely in general. So bad I honestly forgot the worst of it.

2018 – Had I found this website in 2018, I would not be alive. Tried A LOT of things to get better, therapy failed, anti depressants failed. The loneliest, darkest and most suicidal I ever was. .

2020 - With my autism and the hate of changes this fucked with me big time.

2022 – It began with my cat getting murdered with a negligent vet in January. Just seemed to be a year where everything felt weird.

2023 – You know what I think of when I think of 2023? You know the tennis player, John McEnroe, "YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS", that's what I always think of (I'd just be saying in my head, "come on, you can't be serious, bad shit isn't happening again is it?". Destroyed house, hated where I moved to, lonelier than ever. Trust me, joining here in 2023 was no coincidence LOL, the BBC threw me a golden bone when they mentioned this place.

2025 – Lost my girlfriend, keep having public meltdowns (haven't had them since I was a toddler, I'm slipping bad), can't stop self harming, can't seem to make money for anything and I just seem to be more distant than ever. Sadly too much of a pussy to end things. But this is shaping up to be the worst year of my life, by far.
 
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Apokryphiel

Apokryphiel

Leave me
Mar 23, 2025
104
An entire decade of struggles. I'm sorry. I hope better days come for you.
 
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