S
StoicPizza
New Member
- Sep 25, 2025
- 2
I set up an overkill full suspension in the basement that I'm confident would've worked. I did hours of research nightly and, in my opinion was a perfect set up guaranteed to finish the job after meticulous testing. So, full suspension was my first ever attempt. I'm 24M. I was on tne verge of blacking out, but stopped myself and got off the stool. I know I know. Shoulda kicked the stool. That process repeatedly happened for that whole night. I'm wishing I had completed it, because things only get more desperate day by day. As far as partial hangings, I have attempted it many times in many alternate ways since the start of my suicidal craze that started two months ago. Out of the 100 or so times I've blacked out 3-4 of those. Only to wake up wavy dizzy, sweaty, and hearing a low frequency. Kind of like waterfall sounds. Then again maybe it's my tinnitus that I've had for years being affected by ENT damage. Weird, everything felt wiggly and sweaty and i didn't remember what I was doing. Those 4 particular instances where I blacked out, I had no concept that I had just maybe left my body. I felt like my "soul" was leaving this body, to go to another living body it can observe. I did not see or hallucinate this, but I could visualize a concept of a translucent room full of chatter and light music playing. Would've been cool to just join that party in the void. F*** it. I wanna be the void again. For a while. Rest assured, getting it right WAS quick and painless from passing out, to waking up. It was my body that was scared and frantic, not me. I love to know how easy an out this is. However, I was only blacked out 30-60 seconds, then SI kicked in. Next time, I will consciously ignore the SI upon waking up and see how that goes.